Author Archives: twitmericks

About twitmericks

There is an old fellow called Mick/Who's been penning the odd limerick/I admit he's no Keats/But he does them in tweets/So to follow, you just have to click. https://twitter.com/#!/twitmericks "The limerick master of the twitterati" (The Guardian).

LLAP then RIP

Farewell Mr Nimoy, or Spock/ You’d many light years on the clock/ But now it is here/ The final frontier/ You lived long and prospered, old cock./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-31672543 Farewell Mr Nimoy, or Spock You'd many light years on the clock But now … Continue reading

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Hue and Cry Over Dress

A pic of a bicoloured dress/ Provoked a degree of distress/ For what was its hue?/ Gold & white? Black & blue?/ Like many, I couldn’t care less./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-highlands-islands-31656935 A pic of a bicoloured dress Provoked a degree of distress For what … Continue reading

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Llama Drama

A curious beast is the llama;/ A pair of them caused quite a drama/ By breaching the peace/ And dodging police -/ Somebody call Barack Obama!/// http://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2015/feb/26/escaped-llamas-arizona-lasso A curious beast is the llama; A pair of them caused quite a drama … Continue reading

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Fallen Madonna

The popular singer Madonna/ A Brit awards show guest of honour/ Fell arse over tit/ But Madge didn’t quit/ Though everyone thought her a goner./// http://www.theguardian.com/music/2015/feb/25/madonna-brings-the-2015-brit-awards-crashing-to-a-close The popular singer Madonna A Brit awards show guest of honour Fell arse over tit But Madge … Continue reading

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Gerbil Reasoning

The deadly bubonic disease/ Was carried to Europe by fleas/ From gerbils, not rats,/ According to stats/ Collected from rings on old trees./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-31588671 The deadly bubonic disease Was carried to Europe by fleas From gerbils, not rats, According to stats Collected from rings … Continue reading

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The Last Straw

Ex-ministers Rifkind and Straw/ Are seen as a lobbying draw./ For five grand a day/ They’ll help smooth the way,/ Or change a Ukrainian law./// http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2015/feb/23/jack-straw-malcolm-rifkind-deny-wrongdoing-cash-for-access-claims Ex-ministers Rifkind and Straw Are seen as a lobbying draw. For five grand a day They'll help … Continue reading

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Racist Blues

When Chelsea FC went to France/ Some fans made despicable chants/ Dealing with racism/ Urgently faces ‘em -/ A boil that the club has to lance./// http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/feb/22/chelsea-fans-paris-metro-racism-identified-police When Chelsea FC went to France Some fans made despicable chants Dealing with racism Urgently faces … Continue reading

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Californication

A woman from south California/ Desiring her intercourse pornier/ Is suing E.L./ Whose ‘Fifty Shades’ Gel/ Did not make her feel any hornier./// http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2015/02/09/sex-toy-company-sued-50-shades-of-grey-lubricant-el-james_n_6643902.html A woman from south California Desiring her intercourse pornier Is suing E.L. Whose 'Fifty Shades' Gel Did not make her … Continue reading

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#FreedAJStaff

Two journalists wrongly in jail/ Are finally let out on bail/ Now Egypt must see/ They all must go free/ It’s time to let justice prevail./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-31450919 Two journalists wrongly in jail Are finally let out on bail Now Egypt must see They … Continue reading

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OMG HSBC!

The chairman of HSBC/ Which, unchecked by HMRC/ Used every occasion/ To push tax evasion,/ Then joined HMG. OMG!/// http://www.theguardian.com/business/2015/feb/10/hsbc-files-hmrc-cleared-stephen-green-for-peerage-misconduct-data The chairman of #HSBC Which, unchecked by #HMRC Used every occasion To push tax evasion, Then joined HMG. OMG! — Mick Twister (@twitmericks) … Continue reading

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