ALL-TIME TOP 10 TWITMERICKS

After her disastrous 2017 conference speech, PM Theresa May occupies three of the top four spots, with Trump only coming in at 9th place. But May is a long way behind another woman in what has traditionally been a male job. My limerick on Jodie Whittaker being named as the new lead character in Doctor Who put all the others in the shade, breaking the 1750 barrier in two days – and is still going at time of writing. Here’s a revised top 9.

 

1.

July 16, 2017 (1,842 Retweets) 

There once was an old Doctor who/

On dying, became someone new;/

One day she awoke,/

No longer a bloke,/

Cos women can be Doctors too.///

2.

June 9, 2017 (1,142 Retweets) 

There once was a woman named May/

Who threw an election away/

She lost her majority/

And has no authority/

How long can she honestly stay?///

3.

May 31, 2017 (680 Retweets)

There once was a woman named May

Who called a vote then ran away

So ?

If anyone sees ‘er

She missed the debate held today.

4.

October 3, 2017 (545 Retweets)

Theresa May’s fight to survive

Was broadcast from conference live;

She had a bad cough

The wall said F off

And May got her P45.

5.

June 9, 2017 (522 Retweets)

Ex-leader of UKIP Paul Nuttall/

 

6.

June 30, 2016 (433 Retweets)

There once was an ex-London mayor

Shambolic, with shaggy fair hair

Who led us to Brexit

Then ran for the exit

With everything up in the air. 

7.

September 26, 2017 (402 Retweets)

The character limit on Twitter

Restricts how long users can witter

Increasing the length

May not be a strength

And may see it go down the sh* 

8.

November 9, 2016 (380 Retweets)

There was an old billionaire,

A groper with bright yellow hair,

Whom millions of voters

Elected as POTUS,

Engendering global despair.  

9.

March 17, 2014 (303 Retweets)

There once was a ripple in space

That grew at incredible pace

Now close observation

Reveals this inflation

Has left an indelible trace.

10.

May 23, 2015 (285 Retweets)

The Irish have now had their say

From Dublin to Donegal Bay

A motion was carried

That folks can get married

No matter if straight or if gay.

 

*Yes, it’s the old gag of running out of characters at the critical moment – which will become very hard if they give me 280!

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