Monthly Archives: December 2019

Present Perfect

For those seeking gifts for Noel Which retailers globally sell, A limerick history With rhymes that are Twistery Normally goes down quite well. https://t.co/fyTC38Zaq1 https://t.co/lsDtSi5AIK #christmasgiftsideas #giftidea #christmaspresent #presents

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Cold Comfort

Old Boris, when things get too hot’ll/ Escape from the scene at full throttle;/ The member for Uxbridge/ Ran into a truck’s fridge/ With milk in, to look for his bottle./// #BorisTheCoward #Boris #generalerection #GeneralElection2019 #Election2019 https://t.co/iyBnCX7vxs

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A Narrow Squeak

A runaway pig known as Biscuit,/ Who rashly decided to risk it,/ And thought he would try/ A resto nearby,/ Avoided becoming pork brisket./// A runaway pig known as Biscuit,Who rashly decided to risk it,And thought he would tryA resto … Continue reading

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Crisis, what crisis?

When Boris de Pfeffel was shown/ How healthcare’s been stripped to the bone,/ He tried to ignore / The boy on the floor/ By swiping a journalist’s phone./// #boris #Johnson #NHS #SaveOurNHS #GE19 #GeneralElection #GeneralElection19 https://t.co/2OSICehKw5

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Banana Drama

A piece of fruit taped to a wall/ Has brought in a six-figure haul,/ A sum no banana/ Was able to garner/ When sold on a greengrocer’s stall./// A piece of fruit taped to a wallHas brought in a six-figure … Continue reading

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Mocking Turd

A sensitive snowflake named Trump/ Made clear he had taken the hump/ At being discussed in/ A huddle by Justin/ And others who think him a chump./// A sensitive snowflake named TrumpMade clear he had taken the humpAt being discussed … Continue reading

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Cat Flap

A cat with a prestige address/ Had four months off work due to stress;/ The programme for Palmerston,/ So no further harm is done/ , Involves people petting him less./// A cat with a prestige addressHad four months off work … Continue reading

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Apo’strophe Cata’strophe

There was an apostrophe cop/ Who watched every greengrocer’s shop/ For wrong punctuation,/ Whose organisation/ Has come to, alas, a full stop./// There was an apostrophe copWho watched every greengrocer's shopFor wrong punctuation,Whose organisationHas come to, alas, a full stop.#apostrophe … Continue reading

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Fear Factor

When something went bang in the night/ The rest of us woke in a fright;/ For Johnson the fear/ He’ll have to appear/ On Neil is what makes him go white./// When something went bang in the nightThe rest of … Continue reading

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Devices or Desires

Smart underwear some Germans own/ Can swiftly disable your phone/ Till you and your lover/ Get under the cover,/ Ignore your devices, and bone./// https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/smart-pants-to-make-you-turn-off-your-phone-and-turn-on-your-lover-g97zsrpvx https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/1200933320529457153

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