Author Archives: twitmericks

A man Johnson pays to advise Is hoping we all empathise That while we stayed in, He went for a spin To Teesdale – a sight for sore eyes. ///https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/1264985889127772160

The distance to keep is three fridges, Which equals a thousand-odd midges A tall bloke called Gus, One sixth of a bus Or 0.01 London Bridges. #threefridges #SocialDistancing https://t.co/DXy1nkiin4

A quizzer lost out, very sadly, On grounds of pronouncing so badly The Spands singer’s name, But who backed his claim? The fellow himself, Tony Hadley. #tonyhadley #Singapore #quiz https://t.co/SaDC5tNVd6

A good way to lighten the gloom When stuck in a tedious Zoom, Or such workplace meeting, Where everyone’s bleating, Is add a real goat to the room. #goats #zoom https://t.co/Yncydd2jx9

An old woman citing the Bible/ Sued gay people, holding them liable/ For global malaise;/ The judge backed the gays,/ And ruled her complaint was not viable./// An old woman citing the BibleSued gay people, holding them liableFor global malaise;The … Continue reading →

A leader who pushes a drug,/ In order to ward off a bug,/ Which he claims is great/ But doctors don’t rate,/ Is scamming, or else he’s a mug./// A leader who pushes a drug,In order to ward off a … Continue reading →

A football club’s crowd simulation/ Resulted in mortification/ For using – cue lols -/ Inflatable dolls/ Designed for self-gratification./// A football club's crowd simulationResulted in mortificationFor using – cue lols –Inflatable dollsDesigned for self-gratification.#FCSeoul https://t.co/WXVTq5WsxW — Mick Twister (@twitmericks) May … Continue reading →

Blood plasma transfused from a llama May help pierce this virus’s armour, The cells of the beast Providing increased Resistance – move over Big Pharma! #llamaland #COVID__19 https://t.co/vlPH6yeS6N

A long spell in lockdown can suck For frustrated singletons, stuck Without very much To do, say the Dutch, So find a good buddy to fuck. @guardiannews @DanielBoffey https://t.co/mVFLHFDmBe