Category Archives: Uncategorized

Clap in the Face

They’ve been the frontline standard-bearers,/ Those overworked PPE-wearers,/ But vis-a-vis pay,/ Our ministers say/ The motto remains ‘Crap for Carers’.///

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Cat on a hot train roof

“We’re sorry, we know it’s a painYour service is late once again.We have to change platform,As something in cat-formIs sitting on top of this train”. https://t.co/Kofiq48Tyt

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Rishily Rewarded

A fund in the budget has thrownA few towns in Britain a bone,And gives special treatsTo Tory-held seatsIncluding the Chancellor’s own. https://t.co/yI8FeuY5JD

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Moby Dick

The strangest marine creature seen is/ A worm of priapulus genus/ Which squirms on the bed/ And thrusts up its head,/ A quasi-autonomous penis./// https://t.co/y819ZpgzRR

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What’s up Doc?

A doc in a virtual dock/ Gave courtroom officials a shock./ “Please don’t commit perjury,/ If you’re not in surgery”/ The clerk asked, “Then why the blue smock?”///

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Free Verse

Is monetisation a curse,And will it make Twitterland worse?While Twitter’s top scholarsWant dollars for follers,To poets, the charge is perverse. https://t.co/amHraK84V3

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Bum Deal

The detail some purchasers missed inThis popular Amazon listingIs that it is notA cute table potBut one that is spat, shat or pissed in. https://t.co/hGcOkbnoij

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Cummings gets the hump

A dog was subjected to spin,/ And branded a traitor within / Who randomly pissed/ And should be dismissed,/ Because he humped Cummings’s shin.///

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Terror Bite

A lass in Alaska, alas,Was processing natural gasOutside on the canWhen out of the panA bear bit a piece of her ass. https://t.co/1toSLyjbHo

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Winter Cruz

Republican Senator CruzSwapped midwinter power cut bluesFor sunny Cancun,Then said: “What, too soon?Why can’t they just change the damn fuse?” https://t.co/NMtizWT6Cr

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