Category Archives: Uncategorized

Purée nightmare

A truck shed its load of purée/ All over a major highwée./ The Cambridgeshire force/ Located the source -/ Please passata distance, they sée./// https://t.co/ky7Vypq0Va

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Foul Play

A sportswoman feeling distress/ Refused to play ball with the press;/ This made her a menace/ To those running tennis,/ Who seemingly couldn’t care less.///

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Britannia Waives the Rules

A chap with a senior perch/ Left more than one lass in the lurch/ Yet managed to marry/ His latest squeeze, Carrie,/ Somehow, in a Catholic church./ https://t.co/UrLioMwYyE

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Bard News

An anchor reported the death/ Of he who wrote Hamlet, Macbeth,/ And more plays and sonnets./ Though sad Shakespeare’s gone it’s/ Four hundred years since he drew breath./// https://t.co/AOomDu6Skn

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Donor with bread, please

When Johnson was passing the hat/ To fund renovating his flat/ He hadn’t a clue/ Who’d pay, but he knew/ It wouldn’t be off his own bat./// https://t.co/1Zfi7qLnNM

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Fox in Socks

There is an adventurous fox/ Who, when opportunity knocks,/ Will enter, unseen,/ Your washing machine/ (Explaining the absence of socks)./// https://t.co/Hgco27Ekvv

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I wanna be like you-oo-oo

When red-handed tamarins stray/ Near where their pied counterparts stay,/ They alter their vocals/ To sound like the locals,/ Lest accent should give them away./// https://t.co/XIcXO3eU7B

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Exposing Shortcummings

A Johnson adviser who quit/ Attests the PM is unfit,/ The morons who rule us/ Are utterly clueless,/ And Hancock is culpably shit./ https://t.co/gqqkwIwOXx

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Stealth warning

In Bedford and Burnley and places/ Considered as Covid-hit spaces/ Unlocking’s on ice/ In secret advice/ Dispensed on a ‘need to know basis’./ https://t.co/5XofaYQODM

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Filthy Luka

An old man in Minsk had a plan/ To capture a dissident man/By faking a threat,/ Diverting a jet,/ Then watching the shit hit the fan./// https://t.co/8NdiauTJVl

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