Mick Twister

Mick Twister is an anagram of Twitmericks.

Mick writes limericks about the news on Twitter, pretty much daily, as @twitmericks. These are also reproduced below, with links to the relevant news stories.

He is the author of There Was an Old Geezer Called Caesar: A History of the World in 100 Limericks (Anova, 2013) and There Once Was a Man with Six Wives: Kings and Queens in Limericks (Pavilion, 2017)

He writes limericks with a biblical theme for the quarterly 197 Piccadilly magazine. http://www.sjp.org.uk/uploads/1/6/5/7/16572376/____pp197_autumn_2013smaller.pdf

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Moral Vacuum

For Johnson to thus undertake/
To fix the tax laws for the sake/
Of dust buster Dyson/
Was flagrant enticin’ -/
You don’t give a sucker a break.
///

https://t.co/mklVtQsagL

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Pub Hubbub

In Somerset canvassing, Keir/
Nipped into the pub for a beer./
The landlord, a sceptic,/
Went quite apoplectic/
And yelled: “You’re not welcome in here!”
///

https://t.co/AuhN5rkE31

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Professional Foul

The governing body UEFA/
Says breakaway plotters will PEFA/

Their superleague plans,/
Which none of their fans,/
It seems, has a good word to SEFA.///

https://t.co/Q0DEWeubRc

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Gnobody Home

Retailers who seek to import/

Equipment for gardens report/

Since Suez got blocked/

They can’t get restocked,/

And gnomes are especially short.///

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Honourable Member

Will Amos MP, a Quebecker,/
The parliament Zoom session-wrecker,/
Had no way of knowing/
His camera was going,/
He says, when he got out his pecker.
///

https://t.co/b6pYb88jlD

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Copycaterpillar

The firm M and S is to make/
The case, reputation at stake,/
That Aldi has stollen/
The character Colin/
For its caterpillar-shaped cake.
///

https://t.co/8IzUvQPByX

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Lobbying Grenades

The ruling majority smothers/

A probe into Cameron, Cruthers/

And Tory MPs/

Caught up in their sleaze,/

As Johnson admits there’ll be others.///

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Bunny Heist

Police say the world’s biggest rabbit,/
Which doesn’t abscond, as a habit,/
Has just disappeared,/
And so it is feared/
A criminal broke in to nab it.
////

https://t.co/xyt1DxhiOs

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Influence Back-pedalling

Said David: “The access I bought/
Apparently now counts for naught,/
And being thus spurned,/
This lesson I’ve learned:/
Whatever you do, don’t get caught”.
///

https://t.co/6XRvG2TnEy

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Intern-al Investigation

A Tory MP known as Rob,/
Who pestered an intern, the slob,/
By texting her things/
Like ‘Let’s fool, no strings’,/
Got off with a slap on the knob.
///

https://t.co/HqtVxWVkvA

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