Mick Twister

Mick Twister is an anagram of Twitmericks.

Mick writes limericks about the news on Twitter, pretty much daily, as @twitmericks. These are also reproduced below, with links to the relevant news stories.

He is the author of There Was an Old Geezer Called Caesar: A History of the World in 100 Limericks (Anova, 2013) and There Once Was a Man with Six Wives: Kings and Queens in Limericks (Pavilion, 2017)

He writes limericks with a biblical theme for the quarterly 197 Piccadilly magazine. http://www.sjp.org.uk/uploads/1/6/5/7/16572376/____pp197_autumn_2013smaller.pdf

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Jamaica Coalition? No, we Failed

In Germany Chancellor Angela,/

A seasoned political wrangler,/

Believes a new poll/

Can rescue her role/

As fruitless discussions entangle ‘er.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-42057108

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Basket Case

 

There was an old basketball dad/

Who got Donald Trump a bit mad:/

“LaVar seems to doubt/

I got his son out”,/

Cried POTUS. “Ungrateful. Bad! Sad!”///

http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/trump-father-ucla-player-spar-arrest-china/story?id=51274885

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Zimbab-Way Out

There is an old man from Zimbabwe/

Who seems not to be in a fab way/

He now has to choose/

The hard way, refuse,/

Or opt for the ‘call me a cab’ way.///

http://www.aljazeera.com/news/2017/11/zanu-pf-tells-mugabe-resign-face-impeachment-171119140828593.html

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Kiss Off

A lewd rock n roller named Gene/

Was barred by Fox News as obscene;/

O’Reilly & Ailes/

Behaved as rogue males/

But guests, as of now, must be clean.///

https://www.theguardian.com/music/2017/nov/17/gene-simmons-fox-news-kiss

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Muga-bye?

Old Robert Mugabe of Zim/

Made life there increasingly grim, /

Then plotted for Grace/

To rule in his place,/

The chances of which now look slim.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-42035981

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Massive Cock Up

The navy expresses its shock/

That one of its pilots, ad hoc,/

Used vapour to draw/

What those below saw/

Was two giant balls and a cock.///

http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/locals-left-red-faced-after-navy-pilot-draws-obscene-phallic-sky-art-above-town-1647757

 

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You Snooze, You Win

In spite of The Sun’s front-page snaps/

Of BBC staff having naps,/

Awake or asnooze/

Folks trust the Beeb’s nooze/

Above the phone-hackers and paps.///

sun v bbc

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Jesus Christ!

There was an old Renaissance daub,/

A painting of Christ with an orb,/

Da Vinci’s, they say,/

Whose buyer will pay/

A sum that is hard to absorb.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-42000696

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Susej Role

A baker got some people riled,/

Exhibiting what they reviled/

As insensitivity,/

For in Greggs’ nativity/

A sausage roll played the Christ Child.///

https://www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/greggs-forced-to-apologise-after-replacing-baby-jesus-with-sausage-roll-in-advent-calendar-a3691566.html

 

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Oz Mandate (or Womandate)

Australia’s now had its say/

From Darwin to Botany Bay/

From Perth to Gold Coast/

A ballot by post/

Backed marriage for pairs who are gay.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-australia-41992344

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