Mick Twister

Mick Twister is an anagram of Twitmericks.

Mick writes limericks about the news on Twitter, pretty much daily, as @twitmericks. These are also reproduced below, with links to the relevant news stories.

He is the author of There Was an Old Geezer Called Caesar: A History of the World in 100 Limericks (Anova, 2013) and There Once Was a Man with Six Wives: Kings and Queens in Limericks (Pavilion, 2017)

He writes limericks with a biblical theme for the quarterly 197 Piccadilly magazine. http://www.sjp.org.uk/uploads/1/6/5/7/16572376/____pp197_autumn_2013smaller.pdf

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Trump Stumped

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Leavers of Power

New gongs reward those who’d campaign
For Britain to leave, not remain:
Claire Fox and Kate Hoey,
And Botham, althoey
Is happily living in Spain.

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POTUS v Voters

Proposals from President Trump
It may be required to bump
November’s election
Could have a connection
With POTUS’s piss-poor poll slump.

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A Political Hot Patata

A Rees-Mogg named Annunziata/

Gave those in impoverished strata/

Her food-buying tips:/

They can’t afford chips?/

Then let them eat home-made frittata!///

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Asylum Seeker

A racist spoke out to complain
He’s had to leave Britain for Spain,
For Europe gives Tommy,
The immigrant pommy,
The rights he affects to disdain.

https://t.co/XoaBt8FwWN

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Dreaming Demon Semen

A quack with ideas ever loonier
Says what makes folks iller and punier
Is sex with a demon
That harvests men’s semen
(Her fans include Donald Trump Junior).

https://t.co/9RnUPaU6JZ

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Travel Grant

One cannot help thinking perhaps/

The reason the government slaps/

Restrictions on Spain/

Pertains, in the main,/

To wanting to quarantine Shapps.///

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Open Jaw Policy

A woman has made a new line
In flexible face mask design;
The key thing she did
Was put in a lid
From wet wipes, to let in the wine.

https://t.co/Nc1BoKtjZ6

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Is This Mask OK?

Two sex clubs where staff took a stand/

Can open, though brothels are banned;/

The court merely asks/

That clients wear masks/

And service is strictly by hand.///

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Dick Nicked

A sex shop quite near Caesar’s Palace
Was hit by a robber most gallus,
For what could be bolder
Than over your shoulder
To pilfer a three-foot long phallus.

https://t.co/iKqojpaYL7

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