Mick Twister

Posted on February 14, 2014 by twitmericks

Mick Twister is an anagram of Twitmericks.

Mick writes limericks about the news on Twitter, pretty much daily, as @twitmericks. These are also reproduced below, with links to the relevant news stories.

He is the author of There Was an Old Geezer Called Caesar: A History of the World in 100 Limericks (Anova, 2013) and There Once Was a Man with Six Wives: Kings and Queens in Limericks (Pavilion, 2017)

He writes limericks with a biblical theme for the quarterly 197 Piccadilly magazine. http://www.sjp.org.uk/uploads/1/6/5/7/16572376/____pp197_autumn_2013smaller.pdf

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Art attack

Posted on March 25, 2023 by twitmericks

Sacked Principal Hope’s misdemeanours
Were showing the kids Birth of Venus
And other great works,
Thus triggering jerks
Offended by David’s li’l penis.

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Simply no bread

Posted on March 16, 2023 by twitmericks

The Government turned its attention
To those with a million-pound pension,
Instead of a hike
For workers on strike
Whose money is too tight to mention.

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Digital justice

Posted on March 14, 2023 by twitmericks

A courtroom in Canada heard
It was, so the Justice averred,
A God-given right,
Although impolite,
To flip pesky neighbours the bird.

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Assault on Lineker

Posted on March 11, 2023 by twitmericks

With Gary off Match of the Day
Suspended for having his say,
His Tory-whipped bosses
Must now count their losses,
Their schedule in rank disarray.

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A turnip for the books

Posted on February 24, 2023 by twitmericks

“Don’t moan about salads and fruits:
This government proudly salutes
A veg we can cherish,
As foreign foods perish
Let Britain go back to its roots“.

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Leaves romaine in EU

Posted on February 22, 2023 by twitmericks

Officials in Britain allege/
It’s weather, not Brexit, and pledge/
No shortage of food,/
But others conclude/
We’ve hit the thin end of the veg.///

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I’ll be darned!

Posted on February 20, 2023 by twitmericks

Some Romans carved out of a block
A wooden thing shaped like a cock;
Researchers conclude
The phallus they hewed
Was not used for darning a sock.

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Bard fluffs its lines

Posted on February 9, 2023 by twitmericks

When Google unveiled its new Bard,
The debut was fatally marred:
It flunked, in the promo –
Rushed through amid FoMO –
A question that wasn’t that hard.

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Wall-nuts

Posted on February 8, 2023 by twitmericks

Some woodpeckers built up a store
Of nuts in a house, on the floor,
The cute, polyamorous
Tufted wall-hammerers
Pouring acorns galore.

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Are you or have you ever been an economist?

Posted on February 6, 2023 by twitmericks

Liz Truss blew a hole in our kitty
Then cried to the press: “What a pity!”
Although I was right
It all went to shite
Because of those reds in the City”.

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