Spicer Hedges

 

When Comey was given the push/

Sean Spicer hid out in a bush/

So now he’s on leave/

And many believe/

Will shortly be out on his tush.///

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/sean-spicer-white-house-press-secretary-job-james-comey-firing-reporters-bushes-donald-trump-a7729976.html

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He Fired the Sheriff

The president called for the head/

Of Washington’s senior Fed/

Because he required/

That Comey be fired/

To render the Russia probe dead.///

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/may/09/james-comey-fbi-fired-donald-trump

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Old Smokey

Researchers say having a toke/

Aids thinking in elderly folk/

The young, au contraire,/

It seems to impair/

So when we get old we will smoke.///

https://www.theguardian.com/science/2017/may/08/daily-dose-of-cannabis-extract-could-reverse-brains-decline-in-old-age-study-suggests-thc

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How to Kushner Visa Application

Nicole Kushner Meyer’s big pitch/
To China’s outrageously rich/
Is cash guarantees a/
Most sought-after visa/
As Jared’s the president’s bitch.///

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/jared-kushner-sister-nicole-meyer-courting-chinese-investors-ethics/

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National Affront

The far-right contender Le Pen/

Has lost an election again,/

Most voters in France/

Rejecting the chance/

To put her in power. Amen.///

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/may/07/emmanuel-macron-wins-french-presidency-marine-le-pen

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Gardening Tools

It’s World Naked Gardening Day /
So cast inhibition away/
And prune the azalea/
With bare genitalia,/
Hose out and bush on display.///

http://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/2017/05/04/this-saturday-is-world-naked-gardening-day_a_22068394/

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Done Up Like a Kipper

 

Among the electoral stories/

Providing Conservative glories/

Is UKIP’s defeat,/

Reduced to one seat -/

Its purpose usurped by the Tories.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-39815444

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Old Man Retires

An elderly royal named Phil/
Said now I am over the hill/
I’ll skip every function/
And feel no compunction,/
Just hang in the palace and chill.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-39802636

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Hidden Message

May went to the Palace of Buckingham,/
But as for the voters, she’s duckingham/
Afraid to confront/
Those bearing the brunt/
Of policies utterly fuckingham*.///

*The Twitter version, because of the 140-char limit, stopped at ‘utterly’. But i don’t think anyone can have been in much doubt how to complete the last line.

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/may/03/the-snap-theresa-may-bloody-difficult-woman-to-find

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Deja Entendu

Le Pen found the message she heard/

From Fillon, who ended up third/

So terribly nice/

She wanted it twice/

So copied his speech word for word.///

http://www.reuters.com/article/us-france-election-idUSKBN17Y0K0

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