Night Watch

Spectators desiring to spy/

On art restoration must try/

This Rembrandt live stream,/

Fulfilling their dream/

Of literally watching paint dry.///

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USWNT 2 POTUS 0

The USA’s sureness of touch/

In winning out over the Dutch/

Secured for their nation/

The world’s admiration./

The President’s style, not so much.///

https://www.theguardian.com/football/2019/jul/07/trump-usa-world-cup-win-megan-rapinoe

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Statue of imitation

An artist who sawed the odd lump/

From some old Slovenian stump/

And painted it blue/

Said “Can you guess who?/

That’s right, it’s Melania Trump!”///

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Flight of fancy

According to Trump, human flight/

Predates those two brothers named Wright -/

The war in the air,/

Under rockets’ red glare,/

Was waged by the dawn’s early light.///

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By cook or by crook

The Hamburglar pulled out the stops/

When raiding fast-food joints and shops,/

By making a meal/

Of what he could steal./

He’s now being grilled by the cops.///

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Do not feed the python

A python that measures nine feet/

Is looking for something to eat,/

So best you should take/

Some care with this snake,/

Especially if you’re petite.///

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Special delivery

Brazilians show some affection/

For rather a strange predilection:/

They come in their hordes/

To gather on wards,/

And watch a caesarean section.///

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Sick ardour

A fungus impels the cicada,/

In some psychedelic lambada,/

To shag till it’s dead/

As body parts shed,/

Which doesn’t diminish its ardour.///

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Was Boris coached?

Amid all the rows and the fusses/

The thing Boris Johnson discusses/

Is how, as was seen/

In 2016,/

He gets quite creative with buses.///

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The Birds

A couple were trapped for a week/

By gulls that would dive-bomb and shriek,/

Until a gazebo/

Put up by the Beeb o-/

Verhead made them safe from the beak.///

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