Lord Floored

A CNN pundit named Lord/

Whose tweet of ‘Sieg Heil’ was deplored/

Has proven the saw/

They call Godwin’s law/

For which he was thrown overboard.///

https://www.theguardian.com/media/2017/aug/10/cnn-jeffrey-lord-tweet-nazi-salute-media-matters

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War of Words

A fellow named Kim in Pyongyang/
Enjoyed firing off a harangue;/
As Trump in DC/
Joined in with some glee,/
Things started to go with a bang.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-40871416

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It’s a Man’s World

A fellow whom Google employs/

Has kicked up a whole lot of noise/

By saying their sex/

Makes men better techs/

And justifies jobs for the boys.///

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2017/aug/7/google-fires-james-damore-criticizing-diversity-pr/

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Anchor Dropped

Another presenter at Fox/

May find his career on the rox/

As women attest/

The guy is a pest/

Who messages pictures of cox.///

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Going Through the Motions

A dealer who swallowed his wraps/

Held out for 12 days with no craps,/

Surrounded by cops/

Awaiting the plops/

That marked his eventual lapse.///

http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/essex-drug-dealers-excruciating-12-day-toilet-strike-after-swallowing-his-drugs-1633672

 

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Taking the Piss

The Samuel Smith public house chain/

Says customers being profane/

Face being kicked out,/

I.e., if in doubt,/

Fuck off or else fucking refrain!///

https://www.wsj.com/articles/english-pubs-ban-swearing-are-accused-of-having-for-brains-1501774700?mod=e2tw

 

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Favourable Judgment

A Westminster court was surprised/

To hear a young model advised/

In view of her talents/

The JP on balance/

Just wanted her lightly chastised.///

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/08/03/model-tried-steal-1000-goods-harrods-given-slap-wrist-magistrate/

 

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Neymar Your Price

A striker who comes from Brazil/

Coughed up more than 200 mil/

To quit Barcelona/

But PSG’s owner/

In Qatar will pick up the bill.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/40814854

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DC Dump

According to President Trump/

The White House is rather a dump/

It lacks golden showers/

Like those at Trump Towers/

To pamper the POTUS’s rump.///

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/donald-trump-white-house-us-president-real-dump-chelsea-clinton-golf-bedminster-golf-club-new-jersey-a7872096.html

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Bad Habits

Some trainee priests out for a beer/

Were told “You’re not coming in here/

No vicars & slags/

Or fancy dress stags,/

However authentic your gear!”///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-south-east-wales-40792962

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