High School

A chemistry prof, Japanese,
Whose students learnt how to make Es/
Is under arrest
By cops unimpressed
With MD-MA joint degrees.///

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Porn to lose

A fellow whose folks binned his porn/

Decided, to general scorn,/

To sue mum and dad;/

He said: “Though it’s sad, Dilemma-wise, I’m on the horn”.///

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Tiger feat

A golfer well known for his drive/

Rose fast, then went into a dive/

Until Tiger Woods/

Delivered the goods/

For Green Jacket win number 5.///

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Turning turtle

The death of a rare Yangtze turtle/

Ensures that the species will hurtle/

Towards its demise/

If all three are guys,/

So let’s hope one’s female (and fertile*).///

*North American pronunciation, of course – but not much rhymes with turtle. I guess that’s why Siouxsie and the Banshees rhymed it with ‘purple’ in ‘Christine’.

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Every day he loves you less and less

There was an old fellow named Trump/

Who, when he was out on the stump,/

Adored Wikileaks,/

Which now, when he speaks,/

He seems rather eager to dump.///

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Out on his Assange

There was an old man with a beard/

Who said it is just as I feared,/

My embassy haven/

When young and clean-shaven/

Has gone, and the cops have appeared.///

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-47891737

 

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Khartoum Kharacter

Ex-Sudanese leader Bashir/

Held power for many a year/

Till those he oppressed/

Rose up to protest/

And now he is out on his ear.///

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Brex-tension

Theresa May’s stated intention/

Was seeking a short-term extension;/

Though Merkel, Macron/

And others said ‘Non’,/

They threw her a bone of contention.///

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-47889404

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Looking into the abyss

What seemed an impossible goal/

Was reached, as what looked like a coal/

Encircled by flames/

Gave substance to claims/

That Einstein was right, on the hole.///

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IB trouble

On checking a young Taiwanese,/

Who felt something borne on the breeze/

Was making her cry,/

Docs found in her eye/

Four minuscule sweat-eating bees.///

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