Author Archives: twitmericks

About twitmericks

There is an old fellow called Mick/Who's been penning the odd limerick/I admit he's no Keats/But he does them in tweets/So to follow, you just have to click. https://twitter.com/#!/twitmericks "The limerick master of the twitterati" (The Guardian).

Get Rishi Quick

“Hi David, apolz 4 delay,/ I hope we can still find a way/ 2 keep things on stream -/ I’m pushing the team,/ B back in touch l8r 2day”./// https://t.co/KHCC4CkXU7

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Stoned Age

For stone-agers painting a frieze/ Without any acid or Es,/ The rarified air/ In caverns down there/ Was what got them out of their trees./// https://t.co/Z8KDWfHaOR

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Chairs for Herrs

The Erdogan method of greeting/ Top Eurocrats there for a meeting/ Annoyed VDL/ As he and Michel/ Monopolised men-only seating./ https://t.co/mGMwaOvesN

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Uneasy lies the head…

The crown won by Mrs Sri Lanka/ Was seized amid violent rancour,/ The previous queen/ From 2019/ Endeavouring thus to disrank ‘er./// https://t.co/Ggkts9qqSJ

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Amman for all seasons

Prince Hamza, a man from Amman/ Denied he was part of a plan,/ With help from his mother,/ To oust his half-brother,/ For whom the shit’s hitting the fan./// https://t.co/x52kZaK3GX

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Racing Certainty

The government carefully places ’em,/ And sets the assignment that faces ’em;/ They picked Tony Sewell/ As someone they knew’ll/ Deny institutional racism./// https://t.co/3u1902orUr

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Good cop, bad cop?

Inspectors found no single copper/ Did anything vaguely improper -/ They got it just right/ In Clapham that night,/ Which feels like a bit of a whopper./// https://t.co/RETUXwGi9R

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Ship of Fools

If ever a ship blocks the Suez/ It’s clear that the right thing to do is/ Get lots of small boats/ And pull till it floats,/ While gasping at how big the queue is*./// https://t.co/lPoL6OOUi3 *Alternative last line: “Then find … Continue reading

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Saucy Noodle

When Boris was mayor, he’d canoodle/ With Jen, who took government boodle,/ But now scorned Arcuri,/ Though lacking in fury,/ Calls Johnson a cowardly noodle./// https://t.co/gHBUFaPx4W

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Cheeky Pluckers

The latest Home Office defence/ Of 80-odd grand of expense/ To Beautiful Brows,/ Which bought, it avows,/ Some PPE, makes little sense./// https://t.co/sAC86hlSzP

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