Author Archives: twitmericks

About twitmericks

There is an old fellow called Mick/Who's been penning the odd limerick/I admit he's no Keats/But he does them in tweets/So to follow, you just have to click. https://twitter.com/#!/twitmericks "The limerick master of the twitterati" (The Guardian).

School Dunce

The boss of this great ship of foolsTold kids to return to their schools,But then the next dayHe popped up to sayGo home and obey lockdown rules.

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Pubic Art

A sculptor who felt public artWas centred around the male part,Went on to design aBig hillside vagina,Which gave right-wing critics a start. https://t.co/I3B4t0JDL4

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Dangerous Curves

There was an old man who said “Gracious!That poster is rather audacious”,And set out to stamp onA pic of a tampon,Whose shape he found lewdly curvaceous. https://t.co/QRh3iRVCU6

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Je Suis Stanley

While Boris makes Brexit reality,His father shows great practicality,For Johnson’s old man,As shit hits the fan,Is taking on French nationality. https://t.co/i8k8xOFeE5

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Pandemic Pandemonium – The Twitmericks Review of 2020

Farewell to a beast among years When hopes were confronted by fears: Hi Brexit, bye Trump, Pandemic-fuelled slump, Predictably ending in tiers. Yes, with hindsight – or 2020 vision – we should have cancelled this year back in January. But … Continue reading

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No Shit, Shergar!

Police horses called to a prettyWee garden in London’s fair cityTo trample in seeds,And similar deeds,Did not give a shit, more’s the pity. https://t.co/wAJvF8ICRd Police horses called to a prettyWee garden in London's fair cityTo trample in seeds,And similar deeds,Did … Continue reading

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Sup Pompeii

A fast-food joint found in PompeiiWas popular back in the deiiFor chicken and favaBeans till molten lavaDropped in for one last takeaweii. https://t.co/G8uITUP22p

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Brexmas Pudding

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MICK’S TWISTED 2020 CAROLS

All this week on Twitter I’ve been putting a topical twist on some seasonal songs. So here they all are in one place. Merry Christmas your arse! ***** THE HOLLY AND THE IVY The Holly and the Ivy/ Are in … Continue reading

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Poison Pants

“This plot, I’m determined to sus it”,Navalny declared. “I’ll discuss itWith one of the spies” –Who, to his surprise,Revealed they had poisoned his gusset. https://t.co/BYcVB1FVFp

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