Tag Archives: penis

Pecker Checker

Posted on January 12, 2020 by twitmericks

A health testing firm’s come along/ Requesting a pic of your schlong/ With which its new app/ Will diagnose clap -/ Now what in the world could go wrong?/// A health testing firm's come alongRequesting a pic of your schlongWith … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Horn of plenty

Posted on December 14, 2019 by twitmericks

Some worms that washed up on the shore near/ A place called Drakes Beach, California/ Of Urechis genus/ Resemble a penis/ And eaten, it’s said, make you hornier./// Some worms that washed up on the shore nearA place called Drakes … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Are you a shoplifter, or are you just pleased to see me?

Posted on September 27, 2019 by twitmericks

A well-endowed Stoke-on-Trent shopper,/ Suspected because of his whopper,/ Denied he was stealing,/ And stripped off, revealing/ The bulge in his jeans was his chopper./// Tweet and story (also follow replies and my retweets for translations in French, German and… … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Cock rock

Posted on February 28, 2019 by twitmericks

Graffiti inscribed on a block/ Of Hadrian’s Wall-era rock/ Shows right from the start/ The thrust of such art/ Was representations of cock./// Graffiti inscribed on a blockOf Hadrian's Wall-era rockShows right from the startThe thrust of such artWas representations … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Flight of fancy

Posted on February 23, 2019 by twitmericks

A pilot in southern Australia,/ While testing plane paraphernalia,/ Was moved to record/ The message ‘I’m bored’/ And trace out some male genitalia./// A pilot in southern Australia,While testing plane paraphernalia,Was moved to recordThe message 'I'm bored'And trace out some … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Shrinky-winky

Posted on December 6, 2018 by twitmericks

The substance behind the neat trick/ Of making a saucepan non-stick/ Was recently tested,/ And when it’s ingested,/ Reduces the size of one’s dick./// The substance behind the neat trickOf making a saucepan non-stickWas recently tested,And when it's ingested,Reduces the … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Toad’s tool

Posted on September 18, 2018 by twitmericks

A porn star once dear to Trump’s heart/ Described his most intimate part/ As less than humungous/ And shaped like a fungus,/ Like Toad out of Mario Kart./// A porn star once dear to Trump's heartDescribed his most intimate partAs … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

William the Plonkerer

Posted on July 15, 2018 by twitmericks

A tapestry telling through pix/ What happened in 1066/ Shows men and their mounts,/ An Oxford don counts,/ With 93 needlework pricks./// A tapestry telling through pixWhat happened in 1066Shows men and their mounts,An Oxford don counts,With 93 needlework pricks.https://t.co/3GVjmmPvzz … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Massive Cock Up

Posted on November 18, 2017 by twitmericks

The navy expresses its shock/ That one of its pilots, ad hoc,/ Used vapour to draw/ What those below saw/ Was two giant balls and a cock./// http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/locals-left-red-faced-after-navy-pilot-draws-obscene-phallic-sky-art-above-town-1647757 The navy expresses its shockThat one of its pilots, ad hoc,Used vapour … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

‘You Won’t Feel a Thing’

Posted on October 23, 2017 by twitmericks

A man with a very small dick/ Is making the most of his shtick/ By using his penis/ To sell intravenous/ Blood testing as ‘just a small prick’./// http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/blood-testing-company-hires-man-11368206 A man with a very small dickIs making the most of … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment