twitmericks

On WhatsApp some pro-Brexit Tories/
Discussed what to do about Boris;/
“Be loyal”, cried one,/
“He got Brexit done!”/

The Brexit supremo Lord Frost/
Backed leaving, whatever the cost,/
Then flexing his muscles,/
He tried to blame Brussels/
For all the things Britain had lost.///

https://t.co/5L2TvXGlYy

A top civil servant named Case,/
Instructed to save Johnson’s face/
Regarding those parties,/
Said “Come on me hearties -/
It’s everyone back to my place!”///

https://t.co/Bibhz2WPNC

In Oswestry, Whitchurch and Wem,/
The people have voted Lib Dem,/
As multiple stories/
Of partying Tories/
Rebound on a weakened PM.///

https://t.co/XJAxnMEmhp

A pastor whose stomach home-brews,/
Explains when he staggers or spews,/
He isn’t half-cut/
It’s just that his gut/
Has turned all the sugar to booze.///

https://t.co/mzjINfSPZr

Conservative hopeful Shaun Bailey/
Was shown in a popular daily/
At Tory HQ,/
Ignoring Tier 2/
And socially mixing quite gaily.///

https://t.co/3pKAemQ9uf

The champion driver Verstappen/
Was helped by some others unlappin’,/
Which made Lewis cross/
With Masi, the boss/
For how he allowed it to happen.///

https://t.co/s68WsImK4x

The little pink Clangers convey/
Through whistles the things they would say,/
But everything’s scripted,/
And now it’s decrypted/
We know they’ve been swearing away.///

https://t.co/mvVUFpTMT9

In Texas, Hawaii and Guam,/
Korea, Japan and Vietnam,/
When cupboards need stocking,/
The people are flocking/
To snap up some glorious Spam.///

https://t.co/n1ajF2HNPU

“The increase in cases we see/
Requires a move to Plan B,/
Entailing new rules/
For all of you fools,/
And cheese-and-wine parties for me”.///

https://t.co/rjIncQxoK4