Mick Twister

Mick Twister is an anagram of Twitmericks.

Mick writes limericks about the news on Twitter, pretty much daily, as @twitmericks. These are also reproduced below, with links to the relevant news stories.

He is the author of There Was an Old Geezer Called Caesar: A History of the World in 100 Limericks (Anova, 2013). http://twitmericks.com/book-news/

He writes limericks with a biblical theme for the quarterly 197 Piccadilly magazine. http://www.sjp.org.uk/uploads/1/6/5/7/16572376/____pp197_autumn_2013smaller.pdf

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Minnesota Nasty

A dentist who hunted big game/
Sought trophies to garner him fame/
But public distress’ll/
Ensure killing Cecil/
Brings Walter unlimited shame.

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Lord of Misrule

An old orange bra-wearing Lord/
Had fun as he snorted and whored/
But public life’s cruel/
And so Baron Sewel/
Must publicly fall on his sword.

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Lord Sewel Follows Party Line

A peer judging conduct has quit,/

Apparently no longer fit,/

As tabloid reports/

Showed film where he snorts/

Some coke off a prostitute’s tit.///


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Another Planet

A planet that NASA can see/
That’s called Kepler 452b/
Is quite like the Earth/
Though larger in girth/
And may be the home of ET.

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Our Man in Havana

Today, after decades, two nations/
Restored diplomatic relations/
So as of mañana/
DC and Havana/
Can rebuild intelligence stations.

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Her Royal Heilness

There once was a princess so cute,/

Well-mannered, of spotless repute./

But now we see pix/

Of Lizzie aged six,/

Performing a Nazi salute.///


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Squiffy Squirrel

A squirrel got utterly smashed/
On ale from a boozer it crashed/
The rat-arsed intruder/
Got steadily ruder/
And left the establishment trashed.

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Rabbit Habit

A motorist lost concentration/
And crashed due to preoccupation/
While using a toy/
She liked to employ/
For sexual gratification.

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Nuclear Reaction

The P5+1 and Iran/
Came up with a brilliant plan:/
Enrichment is stopped/
And sanctions get dropped/
(Though Bibi is not a big fan).


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50 Cent Penniless

A fellow they call 50 Cent/
Maintains all his money is spent./
He’s probably lyin’ – /
Get Broke or Die Tryin’/
Was never the rapper’s intent.

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