Mick Twister

Mick Twister is an anagram of Twitmericks.

Mick writes limericks about the news on Twitter, pretty much daily, as @twitmericks. These are also reproduced below, with links to the relevant news stories.

He is the author of There Was an Old Geezer Called Caesar: A History of the World in 100 Limericks (Anova, 2013). http://twitmericks.com/book-news/

He writes limericks with a biblical theme for the quarterly 197 Piccadilly magazine. http://www.sjp.org.uk/uploads/1/6/5/7/16572376/____pp197_autumn_2013smaller.pdf

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Father’s Fondant Fancies

A fetishist priest had to beat it/

Because (though I hardly dare tweet it)/

Erotic confection/

Was his predilection/

He’d have his cake rather than eat it.///


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Jet Toilette

According to US criteria,/

The UK loo roll is inferior;/

The Jets came equipped/

And had their own shipped/

To service the New York posterior.///


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ISIS Crisis

The West’s in a bit of a crisis/
Regarding the problem of ISIS/
As Russia drops bombs/
On Hama and Homs,/
Leaving Assad to his own devices.///
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Unsavoury Slavery

The PM showed disinclination/

To finance slave trade compensation/

But offered Jamaica/

By way of icebreaker/

A new wave of crim transportation.///


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FIFA Madness #2

Police are now questioning Blatter/

Regarding a criminal matter;/

He wrote massive cheques/

To FIFA execs/

Whose wallets got fatter and fatter.///


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Emission Admission

VW Chief Exec Martin/
Announced he will now be departin’/
Because of admissions/
Of dodgy emissions/
(Which clearly the man had no part in).///


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Who Squealed?

A leading Conservative Lord/

Has used a new book to record/

Some bestial claims/

Of pig-sticking games/

Involving the PM’s pork sword.///


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Barmy Army

A general felt he should mention/

The army top brass’s intention,/

If Corbyn wins power/

To capture the hour/

By means of an armed intervention.///


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Putin It On

A singer named Elton was had/

When somebody posing as Vlad/

Rang up for discussions/

On life for gay Russians,/

But it was a prankster, the cad!


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School Terror Error

A boy came to school in 9th grade/

To show off a clock he had made/

This started a panic/

Because he’s Islamic/

So terror police staged a raid.///


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