Category Archives: Uncategorized

An email from West Midlands Trains/ Told staff in reward for their pains/ A bonus was due,/ But those clicking through/ Were told: “It’s a scam – use your brains!”/// https://t.co/AgDLdXGe5j

A castle best known as the site/ Where Dracula’s vampires, bynight,/ Took fresh blood donations,/ Now gives vaccinations,/ And hopes that the tourists will bite./// https://t.co/PA6xpcZE7G

A prince titled Michael of Kent/ Was shown in a sting to be bent;/ He offered a route in,/ For money, to Putin./ Perhaps he’s behind with the rent./ https://t.co/JC2AlEZALP

As polling defeat became plainer/ For number one Labour campaigner/ And leader Sir Keir,/ ‘The buck will stop here’/ Gave way to ‘sack Angela Rayner’.///

Dear tweeters, please take this advice,/ And try to say things that are nice:/ Before posting bitter/ And rude things on Twitter/ (Yes, even to assholes), think twice./// https://t.co/2TIrh3Ces4

A town that successfully bid/ For hundreds of thousands of quid/ In Covid relief/ Quite beggared belief/ And splurged on a giant pink squid./// https://t.co/Qyjr8xg6Nm *The Japanese flying squid is in fact Todarodes pacificus. Loligo is a genus including the … Continue reading →

A travel firm taking a bunch/ Of pensioners seeking free lunch/ To tour scenic spots/ Was selling them plots/ For graves, when it came to the crunch./// https://t.co/DJ5T7hiVdv

The God-fearing village of Cornholme/ Has driven the point of its scorn home/ Towards Hebden Bridge,/ A cesspit in which/ You’ll find a more suitable porn-home./// https://t.co/xdSVlkGfrN

“This royal award one bestows/ For unbridled enterprise goes/ To (checks notes) Lovehoney,/ A firm that makes money/ As long as our stimulus grows.”/ https://t.co/H9cZMcvswI

To butter a car isn’t funny,/ Say cops – cleaning up will cost money;/ Among things they dread are/ This crazed superspreader/ Returning, but next time with honey.///