twitmericks

A squirrel out trying its luck/
Espied a bird feeder and snuck/
Inside for some nuts/
And filled up its guts/
Until the poor critter was stuck.///

https://t.co/QkU4ZZHOsH

In Glasgow a big UN meeting/
Said coal, which creates global heating/
Is bad for the planet,/
But just couldn’t ban it,/
A stance that may prove self-defeating./

https://t.co/ZeRldwkqFJ

The member for Torridge, old Coxy,/
Left Britain for islands more foxy/
To trouser vast stacks/
Advising on tax/
And vote in the Commons by proxy.///

https://t.co/hhFLEdZNXL

A net user trawling for cod/
Was heard to exclaim “Oh my God!/
It must be a hack/
Or phishing attack,/
But look at the size of that rod!”///

https://t.co/481wV2jUIv

The people who run Yorkshire cricket,/
Whose sponsors have told them to stick it,/
Said ‘banter’s not racism!’,/
So what now faces ’em/
Looks like a most sticky wicket.///

https://t.co/wnBcd1LRQh

A moonlighting member named Owen/
Reluctantly said he was goin’,/
Abandoned by Johnson,/
Who changed his response on/
Perceiving the way the wind’s blowin’.///

https://t.co/EcngtZ6hh9

The government whipped its MPs/
To alter the rules around sleaze/
And tell Owen Paterson/
‘Graft doesn’t matter, son,/
We’re in charge, do as you please’.///

https://t.co/xkJyLK6Nt2

When Morrisons sought to exalt/
Its chicken, some punters found fault,/
Decrying the boast/
That this British roast/
Used non-EU pepper and salt.///

https://t.co/4tlIm3sY80

A network whose name’s now a curse,/
Rebrands for the new metaverse,/
But can Facebook get a/
Bit betta as Meta?/
It couldn’t get much meta-worse.///

https://t.co/vqyY453Pn3

Escape artist Blanket the boar/
Was so hot to trot for amour,/
He jumped over benches/
To mount porcine wenches,/
And sired little piglets galore.///

https://t.co/N23gZjXHHh