twitmericks

A Q-Anon crystal ball-gazer/
And Washington far-right trailblazer/
Thinks Rothschild conspires/
To start forest fires/
By using the #jewishspacelaser/

https://t.co/LM0wdlRuyh

Some senior hedge funders thwarted/
When people bought stocks they had / shorted/
And scooped up their money/
Are moaning – how funny –/
The market is being distorted!/

https://t.co/dmLEfi711P

In Plymouth you don’t need a pro
To tell you what Facebook now know:
The next thing to heaven
In southwestern Devon
Is riding that beautiful Hoe.

https://t.co/hqZruWHy0Y

I’m sorry, said Johnson, denying
His government’s guilt, justifying
Mistakes and delays
Behind the UK’s
World-beating achievement in dying.

https://t.co/oBQwcV51iK

The Tories, ignoring the pleas/
Of sellers of roqueforts and bries,/
Say things would be beddar/
If Brits just ate cheddar:/
To put it concisely, “Hard Cheese”./

https://t.co/WLg0bfs8ja

One day into Biden and Harris/
Some stuff they’ve been doing so far is/
Executive orders/
On Covid and borders/
And dumping Trump’s boycott of Paris./

Today at the Capitol Joe
Was sworn in where two weeks ago
Seditionists failed
As freedom prevailed.
The loser-in-chief didn’t show.

There was an old man who fomented/
Unrest when his ego was dented,/
But now Donald Trump/
Is out on his rump,/
And totally unpresidented./

A product, one customer claims,/

Endorsed by big Hollywood names,/

Proved too hot to handle,/

Gwyn’s vadge-scented candle/

Exploding and shooting out flames./

The dating apps Tinder and Bumble/

Are helping the FBI rumble/

Trump’s Capitol stormers/

As flirting informers/

Snare Proud Boys in search of a fumble./