twitmericks

At TikTok they banned, for a bit,
A farmer whose turnip-based skit
Left vegans on edge
By saying their veg
Is grown using animal shit.

https://t.co/SdBVJMF32L

The UK has signed memoranda/
To fly refugees to Rwanda,/
Distracting from stories/
Of law-breaking Tories -/
Expensively bought propaganda./

https://t.co/7cJ3lkg9Yb

Police have belatedly fined/
Two chaps far too wealthy to mind,/
Who broke all the rules/
And took us for fools,/
Yet shockingly haven’t resigned.///

https://t.co/G9Rhapth5k

As chargers were hacked to show porn,/
The council was driven to warn/
Those filling with juice/
Against the abuse/
Of gearsticks, and blows on the horn.///

https://t.co/6JhyCiyZ0N

While Rishi the chancellor whacks/
An increase on other folks’ tax,/
Non-domiciled status/
Ensures zero rate is/
Applied to the family stacks.///

https://t.co/fHENH2X5AJ

Mycology experts have found/
A structure of cells underground/
Allowing humungous/
Great networks of fungus/
To chat (and dispute, I’ll be bound).///

https://t.co/Rtmxb5yOqM

Ex-ethics chief Helen was queen/
Of Downing Street’s underground scene,/
They banned us from singing/
Then cheered her for bringing/
The works karaoke machine.///

https://t.co/C2Ky1Gngfy

No reason to panic, keep cool/
And trust in the people who rule,/
As heating costs rocket/
And burn through your pocket,/
They’ll see you’re OK. April fuel!///

https://t.co/mBHNMX9EoG

Old Rishi said don’t fund the Russians,/
But when people said in discussions/
“You mean, like your wife?”,/
Said “Don’t give me strife!”/
And sought to prevent repercussions.///

https://t.co/g97tKP0BAt

The Oscar night comic, Chris Rock,/
Does gags on occasion that shock,/
But after he made a/
Mean joke about Jada,/
Will jumped up and gave him a sock.///

https://t.co/wVtfCyMWRw