The UK prime minister’s dad
Flew off to his holiday pad
Although Greece has banned
All flights from this land.
Does anyone feel they’ve been had.

https://t.co/FgSlDLVimb

https://t.co/g9jjwKPEKr

B Johnson, the number one Brit,
Would like us to see he is fit,
Admiring his press-ups,
While due to his mess-ups
We sink ever deeper in shit.

https://t.co/pvOuQeXE5X

This government’s lapses of wisdom
Are such I can’t possibly lisdom
Or say which is greatest,
But here is the latest:
They bought the wrong satellite sisdom.

https://t.co/wjKjcsgEdc

A 30-year wait has now ended
In spite of a season extended,
No fans in the Kop,
No handshakes for Klopp
And walking alone recommended.

The thousands who pack Bournemouth’s beaches
In mass social distancing breaches That drive police nuts
Are “showing some guts” –
They practise what Boris now preaches.

https://t.co/OP54D4WJu4

An opera, so it appears,/

Reduces poor onions to tears;/

Complaints of monotony/

Ring out from the botany,/

But grasses and wheat are all ears.///

The Trump campaign rally in Tulsa
Was rather a people-repulser,
His bid for election
By spreading infection
As popular there as an ulcer.

https://t.co/Th28zpHwFj

A flatulent Austrian bloke
Was fined over wind that he broke,
The noise from his anus
Indictably heinous
Because it was done to provoke.

https://t.co/1YbnP0fKpi

Diego the tortoise retired,
Whose sex drive was greatly admired;
Held captive to breed,
He sowed so much seed
That 800 offspring were sired.

https://t.co/7YysPaRFWj