twitmericks

Lord Rennard’s unwanted attention/
Became a big bone of contention/
But Nicholas Clegg/
Said he’s a good egg/
And lifted his party suspension.///
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-28862823

The planet’s most highly-pierced guy /
Was not allowed into Dubai/
He said “This is shit/
My face doesn’t fit -/
I’m trying to figure out why!”///
http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/aug/17/dubai-officials-deny-entry-most-pierced-man

The death of a man in Missouri/
Has led to community fury/
Perhaps it will stop/
If folks see the cop/
Who shot him in front of a jury.///

http://uk.reuters.com/article/2014/08/16/uk-usa-missouri-shooting-idUKKBN0GE07C20140816

Iraq’s new PM Al-Abbadi/

Will have to take on al-Baghdadi,/

A ruthless sectarian/

Strict doctrinarian/

Caliphate-building jihadi.

///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-28748366

A pilot while trying to land/
Said: “This isn’t going as planned./
No cause for alarm,/
I just lost my arm -/
Can somebody lend me a hand?”///
http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/local-national/northern-ireland/flybe-pilots-false-arm-fell-off-on-landing-at-belfast-city-airport-30507774.html

A Tory who gave up his seat/
Had problems in making ends meet -/
He can’t buy his spouse/
A nice London house/
And sizeable country retreat.///
http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2014/aug/11/tory-foreign-office-minister-quits-intolerable-expenses-rules

The PM has acted to squish/

Some parliamentarians’ wish/

For him to come back/

And deal with Iraq/

Instead of just looking at fish.///

http://i100.independent.co.uk/article/david-cameron-urged-to-stop-pointing-at-fish-and-recall-parliament–x1DKYj8TMe