Tag Archives: police

Going Through the Motions

A dealer who swallowed his wraps/ Held out for 12 days with no craps,/ Surrounded by cops/ Awaiting the plops/ That marked his eventual lapse./// http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/essex-drug-dealers-excruciating-12-day-toilet-strike-after-swallowing-his-drugs-1633672  

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Chopper Copper

There was a lascivious copper/ Whose conduct was rather improper/ When women got bare/ He’d film from the air/ With one hand controlling his chopper./// https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2017/jul/18/south-yorkshire-police-helicopter-crew-filmed-people-naked-sheffield-crown-court-told There was a lascivious copperWhose conduct was very improperIf women got bareHe'd film from … Continue reading

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Resisting A Vest

A senior Manchester cop/ Was censured for lifting her top,/ Displaying her breast/ And mocking the chest/ Produced by a colleague’s boob op./// https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2016/dec/01/police-chiefs-tirade-about-breasts-was-gross-misconduct-panel-rules A senior Manchester copWas censured for lifting her top,Displaying her breastAnd mocking the chestProduced by a … Continue reading

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Blowing Cover

A copper who goes undercover/ Is banned now from having a lover/ So if you are trying/ To work out who’s spying/ Just offer a bit of the other./// https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2016/jun/29/sex-drugs-off-limits-undercover-police-guidelines A copper who goes undercoverIs banned now from having a … Continue reading

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It’s a Bust!

Two officers went chest to chest/ Disputing whose bosom was best/ The big bust-up ended/ With one cop suspended/ And all concerned under a vest./// Top police officer suspended ‘after row about whose breasts were most attractive’ Two officers went … Continue reading

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Undercover Lovers

The Met now admits it’s improper/ To lie to get sex, as a copper -/ To go undercover/ And when with a lover,/ Come out with an absolute whopper./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-34875197 The Met now admits it's improper To lie to get sex, … Continue reading

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Sex, Lies and Undercover Lovers

The CPS says it is proper/ For someone who serves as a copper/ To take on a lover/ While deep undercover/ And base their affair on a whopper./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-28877001 The CPS says it is proper For someone who serves as a … Continue reading

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Cliff Tiff

The Beeb and the cops had a tiff/ Regarding a raid on Sir Cliff/ We find, said the coppers,/ Deployment of choppers/ By BBC folks a bit stiff./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-28823699 The Beeb and the cops had a tiff Regarding a raid on … Continue reading

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Parental Guidance

Oh dear Muslim mummies and daddies/ Do not let your kids be jihadis/ In Syria’s war,/ Our leaders implore,/ They may get mixed up with the baddies. ///http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/syria-crisis-uk-police-urge-muslim-women-to-report-relatives-planning-to-join-war-9281100.html Oh dear Muslim mummies and daddies Do not let your kids be jihadis In … Continue reading

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Improper Copper

There once was a Met police copper/ Who did something rather improper/ To public abhorrence He spied on Ms Lawrence – The latest policing jaw-dropper. ///http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2014/mar/06/stephen-lawrence-theresa-may-inquiry-police There once was a Met police copperWho did something rather improper& spied on Ma … Continue reading

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