Does Whingeing Banker Give a Toss?

Posted on June 13, 2012 by twitmericks

JP Morgan Chase’s big boss/

Said sorry for making a loss/

The members of Senate/

Must ask if he mennit/

Or really could not give a toss.

///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-18419129

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What a Right Tit!

Posted on June 13, 2012 by twitmericks

There was an old star named Madonna/

Who feared her career was a goner/

So she started a ripple/

By baring a nipple/

To draw mild opprobrium on ‘er.

/// http://music.ninemsn.com.au/blog.aspx?blogentryid=1017767&showcomments=true

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Church Disparages Plan for Gay Marriages

Posted on June 12, 2012 by twitmericks

There were some old C of E leaders/

Who set out the Anglican creed as/

It isn’t OK/

For gay to wed gay/

As marriage is strictly for breeders.

///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-18405318

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You Booze, You Lose

Posted on June 11, 2012 by twitmericks

PM David Cameron’s daughter/

Got left where a child didn’t oughta/

She sat in the bar/

While he left in a car/

(DC shoulda stayed on the water!)

/// http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2012/jun/11/david-cameron-daughter-behind-pub?newsfeed=true

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P-p-p-pervy old Penguins

Posted on June 10, 2012 by twitmericks

The bad penguin’s sexual mores/

Upset UK polar explorers/

They kept it hush hush/

For it made a chap blush/

To see birds being out-&-out whorers.

/// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-18370797

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Wailing Bankers

Posted on June 10, 2012 by twitmericks

Some bankers who live in Madrid/

Were short of a  few billion quid/

A property bubble/

Got them into trouble/

Did we pay the bill? Course we did.

/// http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/spain-finally-asks-for-bailout-and-receives-100bn-lifeline-7834237.html

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Lovely Weather for Whales

Posted on June 9, 2012 by twitmericks

A number of places in Wales/

Got hit by severe rain and gales/

It seems Aberystwyth/

Is top of the list with/

A great need of buckets and pails.

///

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/150-rescued-from-west-wales-floods-7833872.html

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Prison Warders Take Coke

Posted on June 9, 2012 by twitmericks

A fellow named Coke from Jamaica/

Was jailed as a major lawbreaker/

Surrounded by thugs/

He trafficked in drugs/

And acted the mover & shaker.

///

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2012/jun/08/christopher-dudus-coke-jail-term?newsfeed=true

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Blue Moon Over Syria

Posted on June 8, 2012 by twitmericks

UN Sec-Gen Ban Ki-Moon/

Says Assad must now change his tune/

Or Kofi Annan/

And his six-point peace plan/

Are going to be history soon.

////

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-18363286

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Sitting on the Dock of a Bay (Watching the Tide Roll it Away)

Posted on June 7, 2012 by twitmericks

There once was a dock of a bay/

In Japan, till it drifted away/

Thanks to the tsunami/

Although it sounds barmy/

It’s now in the US of A.

////http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/70ft-dock-ripped-from-japanese-fishing-port-in-tsunami-washes-up-in-oregon-7827208.html

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