twitmericks

The spread of the virus has shown
It’s one of the worst we have known,
A serious crisis,
So Johnson’s advice is
To maybe try sleeping alone.

#CobraMeeting

https://t.co/J2WlV0pQ6Z

Joe Marler is facing a call/

For sanction because in the maul/

He grabbed Jones’s nuts,/

A charge he rebuts,/

Insisting he went for the ball.///

A piece of equipment that followed/

The movements of pigs as they wallowed/

Went on to ignite/

A load of pig shite/

When pooed, for alas it was swallowed!///

As all of Australia succumbs/

To panic, expending vast sums/

On scarce toilet tissue,/

One newspaper issue/

Has pages for wiping your bums.///

There is an old man with a hunch
That though this bug may pack a punch,
The number who’ll die
Is not all that high –
But sadly the guy’s out to lunch.

https://t.co/xsxJ4y5V4j

As coronavirus draws near,
America’s feeling the fear
Of COVID-19.
So what does this mean?
A boycott of Mexican beer.

#coronavirus
#COVID19US
#coronabeer
#coronabeervirus

https://t.co/ZYstBrry5q

It’s legal to show a bare breast
To get something off of your chest –
A French court permits
The flashing of tits
As long as it’s done to protest.

#Femen #France

https://t.co/yx12WdQIB9

A sentence on Weinstein is pending
On two counts of sexual offending,
A court in Manhattan
Contriving to flatten
His hope of a Hollywood ending.

#MeToo
#HarveyWeinstein
#Weinstein

https://t.co/xRKRGdMUBH

A minister earning big bucks
Said military strategy sucks –
The future he banked on
Was weaponized plankton
Propelling bomb-filled rubber ducks.

https://t.co/Qf0pQzw56e