Author Archives: twitmericks

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About twitmericks

There is an old fellow called Mick/Who's been penning the odd limerick/I admit he's no Keats/But he does them in tweets/So to follow, you just have to click. https://twitter.com/#!/twitmericks "The limerick master of the twitterati" (The Guardian).

Weiner’s Wiener Revisited

Posted on July 24, 2013 by twitmericks

Ex-Congressman Anthony Weiner/ Whose selfies got ever obscener/ Admitted a pic/ He sent of his dick/ Postdated his first misdemeanour. ///http://www.nytimes.com/2013/07/24/nyregion/allegations-surface-of-explicit-exchanges-by-weiner-after-his-resignation.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0 Ex-Congressman Anthony WeinerWhose selfies got ever obscenerAdmitted a picHe sent of his dickPostdated his first misdemeanour. — Mick Twister … Continue reading →

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Woman Gives Birth

Posted on July 22, 2013 by twitmericks

There was a young woman named Kate/ Who bore an 8-pound neonate/ The wee baby boy’ll/ Grow up as a royal/ Since great-gran’s UK Head of State.  ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23413653 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/359406388985868288

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No Courses for Horses

Posted on July 22, 2013 by twitmericks

A horsewoman out on a hack/ Decided to have a Big Mac/ Mcdonalds of course/ Said “we don’t serve horse”./ The nag dropped a big pile of cack. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-manchester-23403935

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No Froome For Doubt

Posted on July 21, 2013 by twitmericks

There was an old fellow named Froome/ A cyclist of such va-va-voom/ That he kept to the fore/. For most of the tour/ And won it, amid Gallic gloom. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cycling/23399875 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/359045291825463296

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What the Flock?

Posted on July 21, 2013 by twitmericks

There was an old tweeter with scope/ To offer us poor sinners hope/ For purification/ Of shorter duration/ You just have to follow the Pope. ///http://m.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/jul/16/vatican-indulgences-pope-francis-tweets https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/357771303123554304

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A Chequered Career

Posted on July 21, 2013 by twitmericks

There is an old fellow named Bernie/ Who currently needs his attorney/ The boss of F1/ Is now being done/ On bribery charges in Germany. ///http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2013/jul/17/bernie-ecclestone-bribery-charge https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/357489651872841728  

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Texas Drugstore Massacre

Posted on July 12, 2013 by twitmericks

The guards at the senate in Texas Have tackled a feminist nexus By acting to stamp on The terrorist tampon An action that rather perplexes. ///http://maddowblog.msnbc.com/_news/2013/07/12/19441556-only-a-good-guy-with-a-tampon-can-stop-a-bad-guy-with-a-tampon?lite https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/355805362722578433

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A Show of Hands in the Dail

Posted on July 12, 2013 by twitmericks

There was an old Irish TD/ Whose colleague he pawed on his knee/ The louche politician/ Expressed his contrition/ For all this was aired on TV. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-23269961 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/355374707941457920

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G4 Mess

Posted on July 12, 2013 by twitmericks

Security firm G4S/ Has once again got in a mess/ By charging, it’s said/ For tagging the dead./ Its shares are now worth a lot less. ///http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2013/jul/11/g4s-investigated-overcharging-millions-pounds https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/355358499053641732

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Patten of Denial

Posted on July 10, 2013 by twitmericks

The head of the BBC Trust/ Appears to be rather nonplussed/ That over-large payoffs/ Accompanied layoffs/ But surely these things were discussed? ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-23253276 The head of the BBC TrustAppears to be rather nonplussedThat over-large payoffsAccompanied layoffsBut surely these things were … Continue reading →

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