Author Archives: twitmericks

Unknown's avatar

About twitmericks

There is an old fellow called Mick/Who's been penning the odd limerick/I admit he's no Keats/But he does them in tweets/So to follow, you just have to click. https://twitter.com/#!/twitmericks "The limerick master of the twitterati" (The Guardian).

Investments in Vestments

Anglican leaders protest/ At loans with obscene interest/ From Wonga and co/ But how could they know/ That’s where their own church’d invest? ///http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/1855c6bc-f544-11e2-b4f8-00144feabdc0.html https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/360688445212999680

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Prophet Motive

The C of E’s banking on Wonga/ Not ripping us off for much longa/ The church’s agenda/ May see off the lenda/ Unless the false profits are stronga. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-23433955 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/360418231258857472

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Weiner’s Wiener Revisited

Ex-Congressman Anthony Weiner/ Whose selfies got ever obscener/ Admitted a pic/ He sent of his dick/ Postdated his first misdemeanour. ///http://www.nytimes.com/2013/07/24/nyregion/allegations-surface-of-explicit-exchanges-by-weiner-after-his-resignation.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0 Ex-Congressman Anthony WeinerWhose selfies got ever obscenerAdmitted a picHe sent of his dickPostdated his first misdemeanour. — Mick Twister … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Woman Gives Birth

There was a young woman named Kate/ Who bore an 8-pound neonate/ The wee baby boy’ll/ Grow up as a royal/ Since great-gran’s UK Head of State.  ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23413653 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/359406388985868288

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

No Courses for Horses

A horsewoman out on a hack/ Decided to have a Big Mac/ Mcdonalds of course/ Said “we don’t serve horse”./ The nag dropped a big pile of cack. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-manchester-23403935

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

No Froome For Doubt

There was an old fellow named Froome/ A cyclist of such va-va-voom/ That he kept to the fore/. For most of the tour/ And won it, amid Gallic gloom. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cycling/23399875 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/359045291825463296

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

What the Flock?

There was an old tweeter with scope/ To offer us poor sinners hope/ For purification/ Of shorter duration/ You just have to follow the Pope. ///http://m.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/jul/16/vatican-indulgences-pope-francis-tweets https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/357771303123554304

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

A Chequered Career

There is an old fellow named Bernie/ Who currently needs his attorney/ The boss of F1/ Is now being done/ On bribery charges in Germany. ///http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2013/jul/17/bernie-ecclestone-bribery-charge https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/357489651872841728  

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Texas Drugstore Massacre

The guards at the senate in Texas Have tackled a feminist nexus By acting to stamp on The terrorist tampon An action that rather perplexes. ///http://maddowblog.msnbc.com/_news/2013/07/12/19441556-only-a-good-guy-with-a-tampon-can-stop-a-bad-guy-with-a-tampon?lite https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/355805362722578433

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

A Show of Hands in the Dail

There was an old Irish TD/ Whose colleague he pawed on his knee/ The louche politician/ Expressed his contrition/ For all this was aired on TV. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-23269961 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/355374707941457920

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment