Cave Newham

Posted on March 23, 2012 by twitmericks

A nasty young fellow from Newham

When coppers arrived to pursue ‘im

Just sat on his butt

As his violent mutt

Ran out & proceeded to chew ’em.

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ukpress/article/ALeqM5gL7GtwEyoZ9M2k0LhKbDs98B0fEQ?docId=N0053901332479492464A

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Assad’s Trouble and Strife

Posted on March 23, 2012 by twitmericks

A Syrian woman named Asma

Got caught up in Assad’s miasma

Banned from the EU

She will have to make do

With Dubai when she buys a new plasma.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2012/mar/23/assad-family-blacklisted-eu-syria?newsfeed=true

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Killer Killed

Posted on March 22, 2012 by twitmericks

A gunman who lived in Toulouse

Of violent Jihadi views

Was cornered & killed

Not before he had spilled

Blood of Christians, Muslims & Jews.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/toulouse-gunman-mohamed-merah-killed-in-shootout-7581030.html

(OK, what do you think? I’m not going to be funny about a story like this, but try to report the news in limericks where I think I can reflect something about it in five lines. Hope the tone’s OK. MT.)

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Rhyme Time

Posted on March 21, 2012 by twitmericks

Today is worldpoetryday

To mark it I’d just like to say

A few words of doggerel

Is better than bugger all

And lines with half-rhymes are OK.

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The Rich Get Richer

Posted on March 21, 2012 by twitmericks

Chancellor Gideon’s budget

(Apologies if I prejudge it)

Will cut top-rate tax

Which big business backs

But taxpayers mostly begrudge it.

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ukpress/article/ALeqM5h29Uko_cTu8d0p9uFhjhuPxn9j3A?docId=N1219741332254183721A

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Your Very Good Health Service

Posted on March 20, 2012 by twitmericks

There once was a service for health

That wasn’t dependent on wealth

In fact there is still

Tho the NHS bill

May be privatisation by stealth.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2012/mar/20/nhs-reform-health-bill-passes-vote?newsfeed=true

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Queen of Diamonds

Posted on March 20, 2012 by twitmericks

There once was a fairly old queen

The 2nd most lasting we’ve seen

She told MPs & peers

Of her 60-odd years

What an absolute blast it’d been.

http://www.channel4.com/news/queen-praises-support-of-her-family-during-jubilee-address

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Court Orders Truce over Garden Offence

Posted on March 20, 2012 by twitmericks

An unemployed teacher from Kent

Who harassed a neighbour, Herr Wendt

Is bound now in law

Not to mention the war

Or use Vera Lynn to torment.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2117184/Dont-mention-war-Dambuster-man-told-Court-orders-teacher-stop-taunting-German-neighbour.html?ito=feeds-newsxml

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Toll Roads Resurfacing

Posted on March 19, 2012 by twitmericks

Mr Cameron’s latest suggestion

For tackling traffic congestion

Is selling the roads

As state-funded modes

Of finance are out of the question.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/mar/19/road-privatisation-david-cameron?intcmp=239

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Laureate and Hardy Act

Posted on March 19, 2012 by twitmericks

Ms Ellen Sirleaf of Liberia
Appears to think gays are inferior
Mr Anthony Blair
Appears not to care
So condones homophobic hysteria.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2012/mar/19/nobel-peace-prize-law-homosexuality

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