Author Archives: twitmericks

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About twitmericks

There is an old fellow called Mick/Who's been penning the odd limerick/I admit he's no Keats/But he does them in tweets/So to follow, you just have to click. https://twitter.com/#!/twitmericks "The limerick master of the twitterati" (The Guardian).

Never mind the Pollards

Posted on December 19, 2012 by twitmericks

There once was a Newsnight report/ That editors chose to abort/ A fellow from Sky/ Was asked to find why/ And called it a cock-up, in short. ///http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2012/dec/19/jimmy-savile-scandal-bbc-branded-incapable ///https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/281515194008604673

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Rigging Bankers Revisited

Posted on December 19, 2012 by twitmericks

There was a Swiss bank, UBS/ That got itself into a mess/ For fiddling the figures/ The lending rate riggers/ Paid 1.5 billion, no less. ///http://uk.reuters.com/article/2012/12/19/uk-ubs-libor-idUKBRE8BI00L20121219 There was a Swiss bank, #UBS/That got itself into a mess/For fiddling the figures/The … Continue reading →

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Mitchell Stitch-up?

Posted on December 18, 2012 by twitmericks

A former Conservative Whip/ Denied giving officers lip/ Midst doubts on the fitness/ Of one supposed witness/ Who said he saw Mitchell let rip. ///http://www.channel4.com/news/andrew-mitchell-plebgate-police-cctv-downing-street ///https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/281138050770300929

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Her Majesty’s in Government

Posted on December 18, 2012 by twitmericks

There was an old queen who was able/ To sit at the Cabinet table/ She took her position/ In Dave’s coalition/ A bit to the right of Vince Cable. ///http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/david-cameron/9752199/Queen-receives-60-placemats-after-David-Cameron-invited-her-to-Cabinet.html There was an old queen who was able/To sit at … Continue reading →

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Moon Crash Landing

Posted on December 18, 2012 by twitmericks

There were 2 old orbital craft/ Which, tho it may seem a bit daft/ Were carefully crashed/ On the moon, where they smashed/ As NASA HQ cheered & laughed. ///http://www.aljazeera.com/news/americas/2012/12/20121218608378241.html ///https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/281014738245279744

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King of Bunga likes ’em Younger

Posted on December 17, 2012 by twitmericks

There was an old man with a hunger/ For women substantially younger/ But being engaged/ May not have assuaged/ His taste for the old bunga bunga. ///http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/silvio-berlusconi/9748985/Silvio-Berlusconi-announces-engagement-to-27-year-old.html There was an old man with a hunger/For women substantially younger/But being engaged/May … Continue reading →

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Truly, Bradley, Deeply

Posted on December 17, 2012 by twitmericks

The sports personality Bradley/ Accepted his Beeb award gladly/ A tour and gold medal/ For skill on the pedal/ Meant Wiggo’s year didn’t go badly.  http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/sports-personality-of-the-year/9749641/Bradley-Wiggins-plays-guitar-after-being-named-Britains-top-sportsman.html Top sports personality Bradley/Accepted his Beeb award gladly/A tour & gold medal/For skill on … Continue reading →

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My Old Duchy

Posted on December 16, 2012 by twitmericks

There once was an heir to the throne/ With an old Duchy all of his own/ A big corporation/ Exempt from taxation/ Whose income has steadily grown. ///http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2012/dec/14/prince-charles-estate-tax-avoidance There once was an heir to the throne/With an old Duchy all … Continue reading →

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Nut Job

Posted on December 14, 2012 by twitmericks

There once was a criminal klutz/ Who plotted to snip Bieber’s nuts/ The con put his trust in/ A warder, so Justin/ Escaped this unkindest of cuts. ///http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2247964/Justin-Bieber-murder-kidnap-castrate-plotter-bounty-2-500-testicle.html ///https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/279604520219197440

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Fracking Dangerous

Posted on December 13, 2012 by twitmericks

The UK has given its backing/ To shale gas extraction or fracking/ Expect a big shock/ As we see Blackpool rock/ Resulting in Lancashire cracking. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-20707574 The UK has given its backing/To shalegas extraction or fracking/Expect a big shock/As we … Continue reading →

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