Author Archives: twitmericks

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About twitmericks

There is an old fellow called Mick/Who's been penning the odd limerick/I admit he's no Keats/But he does them in tweets/So to follow, you just have to click. https://twitter.com/#!/twitmericks "The limerick master of the twitterati" (The Guardian).

Going Outside for a Leak

Posted on May 11, 2013 by twitmericks

Two astronauts urgently seek/ The source of a cooling pump leak/ Unless they replace/ A part out in space/ The mission is right up the creek. ///http://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/2013/05/11/nasa-astronaut-leak-space-station/2152081/ https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/333244515919998977

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Put Inside for Genocide

Posted on May 11, 2013 by twitmericks

An old Guatemalan dictator/ And gross human rights violator/ Was found to bear guilt/ For blood that was spilt/ Though not until 30 years later. ///http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/former-dictator-efrain-rios-montt-convicted-of-genocide-in-guatemala-8612045.html https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/332996475355275265

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Come on Feel the Moyes

Posted on May 9, 2013 by twitmericks

The Everton boss David Moyes/ Is taking on Ferguson’s boys/ He’ll pick em & coach em/ Cajole & reproach em/ (Perhaps with a little less noise). ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/22453802 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/332569415344328704

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Mr Tory Goes to Town

Posted on May 9, 2013 by twitmericks

There once was a Mr Men story/ About an old chap, Mr Tory/ Who told all the schools/ To follow his rules/ No matter how ancient and hoary. ///http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2013/may/09/michael-gove-mr-men-history-lessons ///https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/332516293725020160

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Fergie Time’s Up

Posted on May 8, 2013 by twitmericks

There was an old man who was hired For 26 years then retired. He must be delighted To quit Man United While managers elsewhere get fired. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/22447018 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/332083696205172737

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Tarby-ed by the Same Brush

Posted on May 7, 2013 by twitmericks

Another old man of variety/ Is quizzed over gross impropriety/ Who might the next star be,/ Accused after Tarby,/ A pillar of mainstream society? ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-22429904 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/331819275868327936

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Gutenberg, Gun-begetter

Posted on May 6, 2013 by twitmericks

There was a guy printed a gun/ To demonstrate what can be done/ With 3D production/ Viz death and destruction/ Those Texans know how to have fun. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-22421185 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/331470645592481793

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One is Well Pissed Orf!

Posted on May 6, 2013 by twitmericks

An actor portraying the Queen/ Distracted by drummers mid-scene/ Departed the stage/ And vented her rage/ In language some may find obscene. ///http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/celebritynews/10039117/By-royal-command-Dame-Helen-Mirren-tells-drummers-to-beat-it.html https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/331393772736901121  

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Ferguson Keyned

Posted on May 5, 2013 by twitmericks

There is a professor at pains/ To say it is not true that Keynes/ Thought just of today/ Because he was gay/ “I’m stupid”, the author explains. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-22417231 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/331050222572666880

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Secrets and Lies

Posted on May 3, 2013 by twitmericks

There was an abuser named Hall,/ Who showed unbelievable gall./ He managed to muster/ Some serious bluster/ But now says it’s true after all. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-22379286 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/330404249542467584

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