Monthly Archives: August 2011

Barton – Fink

Footballing thug Joey Barton/Could start a war in kindergarten/He just needs a ball/His own innate gall/And another poor mug he can start on. http://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/13082011/63/wenger-barton-red.html

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LA Lawman

A former top cop in LA/Is coming to London, they say/UK coppers feel shat on/Believing Bill Bratton/Knows less about crime here than they. http://news.sky.com/home/uk-news/article/16049302

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Starkey raving

Historian David R #Starkey/An expert in Tudor hierarchy/Says Enoch was right/And black=white/He comes out with some right old malarky. http://www.metro.co.uk/news/872277-historian-david-starkey-faces-backlash-over-racist-riots-remarks

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Hughes sues Screws

Lib Dem MP Simon Hughes/Is suing the News of the Screws/In law Glenn Mulcaire/Is required to share/Names with Hughes and whoever else sues. http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2011/aug/11/simon-hughes-news-of-the-world

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Orde restored order

According to ACPO’s Hugh Orde/It was coppers got order restored/And not disquisitions/By smug politicians/Whose speeches his people ignored. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-14501236

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Dave raves

Addressing MPs, Mr Dave/Was quick to condemn the crime wave/He was even speedier/To blame social media/Which apparently tends to deprave. http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2011/aug/11/david-cameron-rioters-social-media

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The Mouth of Louth

Sir Peter Hannay Bailey Tapsell/Conservative in a time capsule/Is out to use #Wembley/For rioters’ assembly/I say it’d make for a crap cell. http://www.louthleader.co.uk/news/local/sir_peter_tapsell_talks_about_the_riots_in_parliament_1_2955705

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Hugger mugger

Student Ashraf from Malaysia/Was mugged in a way to amaze yer/Affecting to aid him/They cruelly betrayed him/Now he’s a celeb, even crazier. http://www.channel4.com/news/online-campaign-for-riot-victim-ashraf-haziq

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Insect in sect

Warren Jeffs’s polygamist sect/Is hopefully totally wrecked/35 years inside/For assaulting his ‘bride’/She was 12 – now what did he expect? http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-14468085

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Riots spread

In London things got a bit quiet/Up north they continued to riot/As Cameron struts/Some are blaming his cuts/With others refusing to buy it.

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