Category Archives: Uncategorized

Radio stars

Posted on January 10, 2019 by twitmericks

Astronomers picked up a trace/ Of radio signals from space,/ Suggesting we may/ Discover some day/ A podcasting alien race./// Astronomers picked up a traceOf radio signals from space,Suggesting we mayDiscover some dayA podcasting alien race.#Space #FRB https://t.co/YSVygXSjOw — Mick … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Cock-eyed prescription

Posted on January 8, 2019 by twitmericks

A woman who to her surprise/ Got cream of the type one applies/ For penile dysfunction,/ Not ocular unction,/ Is now making love with her eyes./// A woman who to her surpriseGot cream of the type one appliesFor penile dysfunction,Not … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Trucking hell

Posted on January 7, 2019 by twitmericks

The government lined up some truckers,/ And taking the public for suckers,/ Said this would reveal/ They’re primed for No Deal,/ The lying incompetent fuckers*./// *Looking back over 2018, I realised I’d used the last-minute swerve-the-swear-word gag about half a … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Ships with everything

Posted on January 4, 2019 by twitmericks

All customers hiring our ships/ For post-Brexit freight-bearing trips/ In case of No Deal,/ When choosing your meal,/ Please order side salad or chips./// All customers hiring our shipsFor post-Brexit freight-bearing tripsIn case of No Deal,When choosing your meal,Please order … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Lunar New Year

Posted on January 3, 2019 by twitmericks

To China it seemed opportune/ To claim the dark side of the moon,/ And show, in the race,/ To colonise space,/ Who’s currently calling the tune./// To China it seemed opportuneTo claim the dark side of the moon,And show, in … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Astro-nuts

Posted on January 3, 2019 by twitmericks

A space probe passed Ultima Thule*/ And sent back a pic of it duly;/ The photo recalls/ A snowman, or balls,/ With one large and one smaller goolie**./// *Pronunciation note: that’s right, it’s thoolie. **Vocabulary note: this may be UK … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Mitt dumps Trump

Posted on January 2, 2019 by twitmericks

His fellow Republican, Mitt,/ Declared Donald Trump is unfit/ And went on to say/ He’s causing dismay./ The rest of the world said: “No Shit!”/// His fellow Republican, Mitt,Declared Donald Trump is unfitAnd went on to sayHe's causing dismay.The rest … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Ferry poor show

Posted on December 31, 2018 by twitmericks

To keep trade post-Brexit afloat/ The government went with a quote/ From Seaborne, though shipping/ May find deadlines slipping -/ They’ve yet to get hold of a boat. To keep trade post-Brexit afloatThe government went with a quoteFrom Seaborne, though … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

STORMY DENIALS – MICK TWISTER’S LIMERICK REVIEW OF 2018

Posted on December 31, 2018 by twitmericks

It’s been quite a year, yet again, and as usual I’ve picked out a few dozen out of the several hundred twitmericks from 2018 to sum up the year’s highs and lows. I kick off with Trump, who’s spawned an … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Bold Sir Michael

Posted on December 29, 2018 by twitmericks

There once was a man on TV/ Who went from sketch-based repartee/ To world inter-railin’:/ Arise Michael Palin,/ A genuine knight who says ‘Ni!’/// No, he’s not dead – in fact, he’s not even resting. Newly-ennobled former Python Sir Michael … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment