Tag Archives: china

Privates Tossed Out

The PLA’s saying no thanks/ To would-be recruits to its ranks;/ They’re fat, it explains,/ With spermatic veins/ Enlarged after too many wanks./// https://www.standard.co.uk/news/world/young-chinese-are-too-fat-and-masturbate-too-much-to-pass-army-fitness-tests-a3617881.html The PLA's saying no thanksTo would-be recruits to its ranks;They're fat, it explains,With spermatic veinsEnlarged after … Continue reading

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Panda Panders

Two pandas, a she and a he/ Were handed to Merkel by Xi;/ Meng Meng and Jiao Qing/ Must now do their thing/ In order for there to be three./// https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/jul/05/panda-fever-grips-berlin-on-chinese-presidents-trip-to-germany Two pandas, a she and a heWere handed to … Continue reading

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Xi Said

Said Xi on a trip to Hong Kong/ One country, two systems is strong/ But if you protest/ You’re under arrest,/ As challenging China is wrong./// https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/chinas-president-tells-hong-kong-not-to-cross-red-line-by-challenging-beijing/2017/07/01/fa6f3860-5c17-11e7-aa69-3964a7d55207_story.html?utm_term=.f48a6e07fd1a Said Xi on a trip to Hong KongOne country, two systems is strongBut … Continue reading

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How to Kushner Visa Application

Nicole Kushner Meyer’s big pitch/ To China’s outrageously rich/ Is cash guarantees a/ Most sought-after visa/ As Jared’s the president’s bitch./// http://www.cbsnews.com/news/jared-kushner-sister-nicole-meyer-courting-chinese-investors-ethics/ Nicole Kushner Meyer's big pitchTo China's outrageously richIs cash guarantees aMost sought-after visaAs Jared's the president's bitch. — … Continue reading

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Eel Feel That!

A man put an eel up his butt/ Which made its way into his gut/ Although constipation/ Was his explanation/ The case is not open and shut./// http://shanghaiist.com/2017/04/20/live_eel_constipation_cure.php https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/855868770220482561

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Having Your Cake and Bombing it

With global relations at stake/ Trump had a decision to make -/ To target or not/ Some place he forgot/ Or wait till they finished the cake?/// http://edition.cnn.com/2017/04/12/politics/donald-trump-xi-jingping-syria-chocolate-cake/ With global relations at stakeTrump had a decision to make –To target … Continue reading

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And He Would Ride 500 Miles…

A cyclist began in Shandong/ A journey 1000 miles long/ Although with persistence/ He did half the distance,/ Alas, the direction was wrong. A cyclist began in ShandongA journey 1000 miles longAlthough with persistenceHe did half the distance,Alas, the direction … Continue reading

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Trump is a Massive Cock

A Chinese purveyor of shlock/ Denies he intended to mock/ The POTUS-elect/ With his large erect/ Inflatable yellow-haired cock./// http://townhall.com/tipsheet/christinerousselle/2017/01/13/chinese-factory-selling-rooster-balloon-that-looks-exactly-like-donald-trump-denies-its-supposed-to-be-donald-trump-n2271095 A Chinese purveyor of shlockDenies he intended to mockThe POTUS-electWith his large erectInflatable yellow-haired cock. — Mick Twister (@twitmericks) January … Continue reading

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Smackers in the Bank

A trainer in one Chinese bank/ Assaulted the staff with a plank/ He felt flagellation/ Might help motivation/ So gave them a jolly good spank./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-36583486 A trainer in one Chinese bankAssaulted the staff with a plankHe felt flagellationMight help … Continue reading

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Orf With His Head

Elizabeth, HM the Queen/ Was overheard venting her spleen- / That envoy from China/ Said Lizzy Regina/ Is ruder than any one’s seen./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-36263685 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/730515180635996160

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