Tag Archives: boris johnson

It’s The Way You Vellum

Posted on October 15, 2019 by twitmericks

When Queens read proposals on vellum/ They say what prime ministers tellum,/ But whether on goatskin/ Or Boris’s scroteskin,/ His bills are so rank you can smellum./// When Queens read proposals on vellumThey say what prime ministers tellum,But whether on … Continue reading →

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Magnetic Pole

Posted on October 8, 2019 by twitmericks

An entrepreneur known as Jennifer/ Boasts skill at enamouring men of ‘er,/ Her dances on poles/ Attract simple souls/ Like Johnson, whom she has antennae for./// An entrepreneur known as JenniferBoasts skill at enamouring men of 'er,Her dances on polesAttract … Continue reading →

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Being extorted*

Posted on October 2, 2019 by twitmericks

“When stuff goes cross-border post-Brexit,/ Ten miles away somebody chexit./ With this cunning plan”,/ Said Boris, “I can/ Pretend it’s the EU wot rexit!”/// *The title is an anagram of ‘Get Brexit Done’ https://www.cnbc.com/2019/10/02/boris-johnson-promises-no-brexit-checks-at-irish-border.html "When stuff goes cross-border post-Brexit,Ten miles … Continue reading →

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The Audacity of Grope

Posted on September 30, 2019 by twitmericks

A man who compulsively lies/ Robustly and firmly denies/ Reports that reveal/ #How, during a meal,/ He doubly groped two women’s thighs./// A man who compulsively lies Robustly and firmly denies Reports that revealHow, during a meal,He doubly groped two … Continue reading →

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Johnson beaten

Posted on September 25, 2019 by twitmericks

Presiding in court, Lady Hale/ Made clear Johnson’s mark was a fail,/ And ruling as one/ Against what he’d done,/ The judges were not pro-rogue male. Tweet+story

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Friends with benefits

Posted on September 23, 2019 by twitmericks

Old Boris de Pfeffel, as Mayor/ Allegedly failed to declare/ He let the odd penny for/ Brit firms go to Jennifer/ With whom he was in an affair./// On twitter

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Incredible Sulk

Posted on September 16, 2019 by twitmericks

Perceiving the level of odium,/ Brave Boris abandoned the podium,/ The brown-trousered haste/ With which the man raced/ Suggesting a need for immodium./// On Twitter  

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Gimme Strength!

Posted on September 16, 2019 by twitmericks

The PM declares he is Hulk/ Whose monstrous and infantile sulk/ Will make him grow muscles;/ Officials in Brussels/ Reply “What the actual fulk?”/// On Twitter The PM declares he is HulkWhose monstrous and infantile sulkWill make him grow muscles;Officials … Continue reading →

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Prorogue Mahone Again

Posted on September 11, 2019 by twitmericks

A court found proroguing to stimey,/ As Johnson has done, rather grimy -/ It’s very unlawful/ And also quite awful,/ Misleading the number one limey./// A court found proroguing to stimey,As Johnson has done, rather grimy –It's very unlawfulAnd also … Continue reading →

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Ruddy Shocking

Posted on September 8, 2019 by twitmericks

Poor gullible dupe Amber Rudd/ Is shocked to find Johnson a dudd/ Whose actions reveal/ His talk of a deal/ Is just a big mountain of crudd./// Poor gullible dupe Amber RuddIs shocked to find Johnson a duddWhose actions revealHis … Continue reading →

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