Tag Archives: tories

Brexiteer’s Bumpy Landing

Posted on August 21, 2018 by twitmericks

A Tory jumped out of a plane/ And pulled at the toggle in vain -/ Though Brexiteer Steve/ Implored it to leave/ His parachute chose to remain./// Look, he survived, OK? I’m not that callous! A Tory jumped out of … Continue reading →

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Jail Fail

Posted on August 21, 2018 by twitmericks

A privately-run UK jail/ Was deemed a complete epic fail,/ The prison in Birmingham/ It seems is confirming ’em/ Unsuitable assets for sale./// Slightly tweaked the third and fourth lines from the Twitter version to aid clarity. But perhaps the … Continue reading →

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Dishonourable Members

Posted on July 19, 2018 by twitmericks

Old Julian Smith, the Chief Whip,/ Whose party is losing its grip,/ Instructed the Chair/ To break with his pair/ Then brushed it all off as a slip./// Old Julian Smith, the Chief Whip,Whose party is losing its grip,Instructed the … Continue reading →

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Member Exposed

Posted on July 17, 2018 by twitmericks

There is an old member for Burton/ Whom tabloids have published some dirt on -/ He sent the odd sext/ That made women vexed,/ And left his position uncertain./// There is an old member for BurtonWhom tabloids have published some … Continue reading →

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Chequered Careers

Posted on July 6, 2018 by twitmericks

Holed up in the county of Buckingham/ They tackled disputes without duckingham,/ And broadly agreed/ On how to proceed,/ But as for our prospects, they’re fatally damaging them./// https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-44747444 Holed up in the county of BuckinghamThey tackled disputes without duckingham,And … Continue reading →

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Hard to Credit

Posted on July 5, 2018 by twitmericks

The minister Esther McVey/ Admits that attempting to say/ The office for audits/ Delivered her plaudits/ Was kind of untrue in a way./// https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2018/jul/04/esther-mcvey-welfare-secretary-misled-parliament-over-reforms-auditors-say The minister Esther McVeyAdmits that attempting to sayThe office for auditsDelivered her plauditsWas kind of untrue … Continue reading →

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Father Brexmas

Posted on June 17, 2018 by twitmericks

Conservative ministers say/ That Brexit will bring the UK/ A shedload of wealth/ To pay for our health,/ Delivered by unicorn sleigh./// https://www.newstatesman.com/politics/health/2018/06/there-no-brexit-dividend-spend-nhs Conservative ministers sayThat Brexit will bring the UKA shedload of wealthTo pay for our health,Delivered by unicorn … Continue reading →

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Loose Hannan

Posted on May 10, 2018 by twitmericks

A Brexit campaigner named Dan/ Admits things aren’t going to plan – / We’re chasing, he feels,/ The worst of all deals;/ The shit is now hitting the fan./// A Brexit campaigner named DanAdmits things aren't going to plan – … Continue reading →

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Gas Power Stance

Posted on May 1, 2018 by twitmericks

Sajid made a stand from the start/ With legs that were splayed wide apart,/ The power position/ A top politician/ Adopts when he’s bracing to fart./// Sajid made a stand from the startWith legs that were splayed wide apart,The power … Continue reading →

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Ruddy Awful

Posted on April 29, 2018 by twitmericks

The member for Hastings and Rye/ Has bid the Home Office goodbye;/ Unable to handle/ The Windrushgate scandal,/ And caught by a Ruddy great lie./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-43944988 The member for Hastings and RyeHas bid the Home Office goodbye;Unable to handleThe #Windrushgate … Continue reading →

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