Monthly Archives: April 2014

Not EU, Darling

A UKIP campaign causing strife/ Says EU migration is rife/ And jobs meant for Brits/ Are taken by Fritz/ (Not least Nigel Farage’s wife). ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-27115043 A UKIP campaign causing strife Says EU migration is rife And jobs meant for Brits Are taken by Fritz (Not … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Back, Sack and Crack

  This one was inspired by today’s front page of the Sun:  Well. it was virtually a limerick already, just needed a few tweaks, so I had a go: Old Moyesy was stabbed in the back/ He said as they … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The Frozen One

There was an old fellow named Moyes/ Who took over Ferguson’s boys/ Before very long/ It all went Pete Tong./ What football creates it destroys. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/27107795 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/458521008635658241

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Do You Know the Way from San Jose?

A teenager left San Jose/ By secretly stowing away/ And managed to fly/ From there to Hawaii/ To airline officials’ dismay. ///http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/apr/21/teenage-stowaway-survives-flight-pacific-california-hawaii A teenager left San JoseBy secretly stowing awayAnd managed to flyFrom there to HawaiiTo airline officials' dismay. — … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Silvio Foxed

A former top leader in Rome/ Of heavily transplanted dome/ Who liked bunga-bunga/ With women much younger/ Now works in an old people’s home. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-27033315 A former top leader in RomeOf heavily transplanted domeWho liked bunga-bungaWith women much youngerNow works … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Booty-flicker Back

There is an old man in Algiers/ Who’s in for another 5 years/ Although Bouteflika/ Gets weaker & weaker/ His hold on the state perseveres. ///http://uk.reuters.com/article/2014/04/18/uk-algeria-election-results-idUKBREA3H0IN20140418 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/457261869586477056

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Chronicle of A Death

There was an old man, Gabriel/  To whom we must now say farewell/ His novels live on/ But Marquez is gone/ A death we could sadly foretell. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-27073911 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/456944489891102720

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged | Leave a comment

Taking the Piss

A reservoir had to be drained/So Portland officials explained/When someone passed water/Where nobody oughta/(Let’s hope all the fishes refrained). ///http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/apr/17/portland-flush-38m-gallons-water-man-urinates-reservoir?commentpage=2https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/456848916638867457    

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

News of The Screws

The ex-tabloid editor Andy/ Admitted that when he got randy/ He romped in the sack/ With fellow Screws hack/ Rebekah (his boss, which was handy) ///http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2014/apr/14/andy-coulson-affair-rebekah-brooks-was-wrong The ex-tabloid editor Andy Admitted that when he got randy He romped in the sack With fellow … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Not Fare

A hedgie commuting by rail/ Whose fare-dodging went off the scale/ Has had to repay/ Some 43K/ But being so rich, avoids jail. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-27011497 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/455667680830562304  

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment