Lord Sewel Follows Party Line

Posted on July 26, 2015 by twitmericks

A peer judging conduct has quit,/

Apparently no longer fit,/

As tabloid reports/

Showed film where he snorts/

Some coke off a prostitute’s tit.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-33667676

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Another Planet

Posted on July 23, 2015 by twitmericks

A planet that NASA can see/
That’s called Kepler 452b/
Is quite like the Earth/
Though larger in girth/
And may be the home of ET.///
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-33641648

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Our Man in Havana

Posted on July 21, 2015 by twitmericks

Today, after decades, two nations/
Restored diplomatic relations/
So as of mañana/
DC and Havana/
Can rebuild intelligence stations.///
http://edition.cnn.com/2015/07/19/politics/cuba-u-s-embassies-opening/

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Her Royal Heilness

Posted on July 19, 2015 by twitmericks

There once was a princess so cute,/

Well-mannered, of spotless repute./

But now we see pix/

Of Lizzie aged six,/

Performing a Nazi salute.///

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/royals/6548665/Their-Royal-Heilnesses.html

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Squiffy Squirrel

Posted on July 18, 2015 by twitmericks

A squirrel got utterly smashed/
On ale from a boozer it crashed/
The rat-arsed intruder/
Got steadily ruder/
And left the establishment trashed.///
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/drunk-squirrel-causes-hundreds-of-pounds-worth-of-damage-at-private-members-club-10394099.html

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Rabbit Habit

Posted on July 14, 2015 by twitmericks

A motorist lost concentration/
And crashed due to preoccupation/
While using a toy/
She liked to employ/
For sexual gratification.///
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/sex-drive-female-motorist-ploughs-6056180

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Nuclear Reaction

Posted on July 14, 2015 by twitmericks

The P5+1 and Iran/
Came up with a brilliant plan:/
Enrichment is stopped/
And sanctions get dropped/
(Though Bibi is not a big fan).///

https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/national-security/from-fear-of-war-to-diplomatic-accord-the-steps-to-a-nuclear-agreement/2015/07/14/9eb34c6e-2a1e-11e5-bd33-395c05608059_story.html

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50 Cent Penniless

Posted on July 14, 2015 by twitmericks

A fellow they call 50 Cent/
Maintains all his money is spent./
He’s probably lyin’ – /
Get Broke or Die Tryin’/
Was never the rapper’s intent.///
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-33514174

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Mexican Wave

Posted on July 13, 2015 by twitmericks

The head of a fearsome cartel/
Has bidden his prison farewell/
Associates tunneled/
As money was funneled/
To those keeping watch on his cell.///
http://www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/el-chapo-escapes-again

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Coup de Greece

Posted on July 13, 2015 by twitmericks

The people who run the EU/
Are telling the Greeks what to do./
They’ve lost their autonomy/
To run the economy/
That is why #ThisIsACoup.///
http://www.theguardian.com/business/2015/jul/13/thisisacoup-germany-faces-backlash-over-tough-greece-bailout-demands

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