Dildo Fails Penetration Test

Posted on April 6, 2017 by twitmericks

Consumers beware of the fact/

A wifi sex toy can be hacked/

To livestream your cavity/

So those of depravity/

Can watch your most intimate act.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-39490391

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The Killer in Manila

Posted on April 5, 2017 by twitmericks

Old Liam Fox went to Manila/

And talked to a self-confessed killer/

Of values we share/

Though some may compare/

Duterte’s with those of Attila.///

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/apr/04/liam-fox-meets-philippine-president-rodrigo-duterte

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Storm in an Eggcup

Posted on April 4, 2017 by twitmericks

A Cadbury Easter egg hunt/

Allegedly caused an affront/

By downplaying Easter/

Which May said displeased ‘er,/

Exploiting a populist stunt.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-39487307

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Moyes and Girls

Posted on April 4, 2017 by twitmericks

A football team managing chap/

Who offered a woman a slap/

For asking a question/

Disliked her suggestion/

The pressure is on as he’s crap.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/39484238

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Pedant’s Revolt

Posted on April 3, 2017 by twitmericks

A Bristol apostrophe cop/

Corrects errant signs shop by shop/

His rectification/

Of rogue punctuation/

Brings grammar abuse to a stop.///

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2017/apr/03/banksy-of-punctuation-puts-full-stop-bad-grammar-bristol

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Rocky Road to Brexit

Posted on April 2, 2017 by twitmericks

The UK insists it won’t falter/
Despite EU moves on Gibraltar/
A deal with the bloc/
Now hangs on the rock/
So someone’s position must alter.///

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/mar/31/future-of-gibraltar-at-stake-in-brexit-negotiations

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Global Financial Elite

Posted on April 1, 2017 by twitmericks

A small group of millionaires/
With lucrative holdings and shares/
Like Jared, Ivanka/
And Gary the banker,/
Is now running White House affairs.///

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/stephen-bannon-earned-nearly-1-million-last-year-more-than-half-from-mercer-entities/2017/03/31/f8464ede-166c-11e7-ada0-1489b735b3a3_story.html?tid=pm_politics_pop&utm_term=.07c9fdb8b781

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Brex Appeal

Posted on March 31, 2017 by twitmericks

The EU draft programme for Brexit/
Once every member state chexit/
Is do it in stages/
Don’t let it take ages/
And hope that no bugger rejexit.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-39453338

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Divorce Clause

Posted on March 30, 2017 by twitmericks

King Henry VIII had a clause/

For swift proclamation of laws/

It’s now back in force/

In Britain’s divorce/

To further the Brexiteers’ cause.///

http://edition.cnn.com/2017/03/30/europe/great-repeal-bill-henry-viii-clauses/

 

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That Brexit Letter in Brief

Posted on March 29, 2017 by twitmericks

As Prime Minister of the UK/

I’m writing this letter to say/

I want to break free/

It’s not EU, it’s me./

Sincerely, Theresa M. May.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-39422353

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