Turning a deaf ear

Posted on November 19, 2018 by twitmericks

The POTUS, he says, hasn’t heard a/

Recording depicting a murder/

And leaps to defend/

His bloodthirsty friend/

In terms that get ever absurder.///

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Farts match

Posted on November 17, 2018 by twitmericks

A Dutch player losing at darts/

Declared he’d been put off by farts;/

The Scot said “Who smelt it,/

We tend to find, dealt it -/

Try sniffing your own nether parts!”///

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Weight to go

Posted on November 17, 2018 by twitmericks

A weight which was called Le Grand K/

Was woefully wasting away;/

The world was as one/

On what would be done,/

And worked out a new way to weigh.///

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Leavers gonna leave

Posted on November 15, 2018 by twitmericks

A two-parter for you today…

1)

Dear PM, So long, it’s been real,/

But now on reflection I feel/

I cannot in conscience/

Support this old nonsense -/

Although I helped broker the deal.///

2)

Dear kindly Prime Minister May,/

I’m sadly unable to stay/

And serve in a cabinet/

Without Mr Raabinet,/

Sincere regards, Esther McVey.///

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-46219495

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Cabinet pudding

Posted on November 14, 2018 by twitmericks

The Cabinet meeting on Brexit/

Agreed, though the details still vex it,/

The deal done by May,/

But most pundits say/

Just wait till the Commons rejects it.///

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-46215930

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Writer-Man

Posted on November 13, 2018 by twitmericks

A hero creator named Stan/
Helped give us the whole Marvel clan/
From Spidey and Thor/ 
To Fantastic Four -/
Let’s hear it for Comic Book Man.///

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Fair weather friend

Posted on November 11, 2018 by twitmericks

Remembering those who were slain/

And promising never again/

Brings leaders together/

Whatever the weather -/

But not Donald Trump if it’s rain.///

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-46168995

 

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Raab sees Brexit

Posted on November 8, 2018 by twitmericks

The Brexit Sec’s lately been struck/

That Britain needs shipments by truck/

That pass through Calais;/

The rest of us say:/

“I mean, what the actual fuck?”///

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There was an old man…

Posted on November 8, 2018 by twitmericks

An old man who finds it frustrating/

His years deter women from dating/

Seeks legal redress/

To make his age less,/

Improving his low Tinder rating.///

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Sessions out

Posted on November 7, 2018 by twitmericks

The White House has fired Jeff Sessions/

Who wouldn’t support Trump’s suppressions,/

And named a politicker/

Named Matthew Whitaker/

To help cover up his transgressions.///

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/nov/07/jeff-sessions-fired-us-attorney-general

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