Earth Mover

Posted on December 10, 2017 by twitmericks

A recent explosion from Kim/

Has altered the world’s outer rim/

The man from Pyongyang/

Said this was a bang/

That sure made the earth move for him.///

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Gin Sling

Posted on December 9, 2017 by twitmericks

While holding a drink, young Ben Duckett/

Unwisely decided to chuckett/

He said though I should/

Take care and be good/

I’ve had a few pints now, so Fuckett.///

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2017/dec/09/england-ben-duckett-dropped-ashes-tour-game-after-perth-bar-incident

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Blockhead

Posted on December 8, 2017 by twitmericks

A foolhardy YouTubing pranker/

Attracted the Fire Brigade’s rancour/

For anyone shovin’/

His head in an oven/

Filled up with cement is a witless imbecile.///

https://news.sky.com/story/youtube-prankster-cements-head-in-microwave-in-wolverhampton-11160640

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Bringing Home the Bacon?

Posted on December 8, 2017 by twitmericks

This little pig went to Brussels/

To break with the Treaty of Rome/

But after some flexing of muscles/

Went Oui Oui Oui all the way home.///

*The observant among you will have instantly noticed that this is not a limerick. I can only account for this rare divergence on my part by observing that I am not firmly bound by the rules of the limerick format, although I do maintain full alignment with them on a purely voluntary basis.

https://www.newstatesman.com/politics/staggers/2017/12/key-points-brexit-deal-and-what-it-means-theresa-may

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

To be Franken…

Posted on December 7, 2017 by twitmericks

Announcing his own resignation/

Because of alleged molestation/

Al Franken suggests/

When talking sex pests/

We look at the head of the nation.///

https://www.thedailybeast.com/al-franken-ironic-im-leaving-when-trump-roy-moore-have-support

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Notes on a Scandal

Posted on December 6, 2017 by twitmericks

There was a young model, Christine,/

Who when she was only 19/

By having affairs/

And sitting on chairs/

Shook up the political scene.///

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2017/dec/05/christine-keeler-former-model-at-heart-of-profumo-affair-dies

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Brex for the Border

Posted on December 4, 2017 by twitmericks

As Britain negotiates Brexit/
The border continues to vexit/
With May’s coalition/
In fragile condition/
This could be the issue that fexit.///

https://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/republic-of-ireland/dup-vows-to-block-any-brexit-border-deal-which-separates-ni-from-rest-of-uk-36376499.html

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Whole of the Moon

Posted on December 3, 2017 by twitmericks

Today as of late afternoon/

The perigee proved opportune/

Tonight what was present/

Was not just the crescent/

For you saw the whole of the moon.///

***

My jumping off point for this one was this song by The Water Boys, the key line of which near as dammit fits a limerick metre. Story below.

***

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-42211288

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Blue Green

Posted on December 1, 2017 by twitmericks

The minister looked so forlorn,/

His allies were driven to warn/

It’s very improper/

For some retired copper/

To comment on Damien’s porn.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-42197309

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Too Smelly for Delhi

Posted on December 1, 2017 by twitmericks

A fellow with fire in his belly,/

Arrested while heading to Delhi,/

Kicked up a big fuss/

When thrown off the bus/

Because of his socks being smelly.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-india-42192221

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment