Trump Family Values

Ivanka and Jared were thrilled/

To witness Trump’s promise fulfilled,/

And show the U.S./

Just couldn’t care less/

How many protesters are killed.///

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Arsene About

Old Arsene the Arsenal boss,/
Went 49 games without loss,/
Displaying great reason/
For many a season,/
Though zipping his coat made him cross.///

https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2018/may/13/arsene-wenger-final-bow-arsenal-huddersfield-town

 

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Storming Performance

As SuRie got up to perform,/

So multiple sources inform,/

A man in a rage/

Appearing onstage/

Obeyed her instruction to Storm.///

https://www.standard.co.uk/news/world/uk-eurovision-entry-surie-breaks-silence-after-stage-invader-storms-stage-and-snatches-mic-a3837606.html

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Leave it Out!

In Britain’s EU referendum/
Campaigners had funds and could spendum/
But now a review/
Shows Leave.EU/
Thinks rules are for Leavers to bendum.///

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2018/may/11/leaveeu-fined-70k-breaches-of-electoral-law-eu-referendum

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Loose Hannan

A Brexit campaigner named Dan/
Admits things aren’t going to plan – /
We’re chasing, he feels,/
The worst of all deals;/
The shit is now hitting the fan.///

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Depleted Capacity

There once was a deal on Iranian/
Restraint in enriching uranium,/
Which President Trump/
Decided to dump,/
Not having a brain in his cranium.///

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-iran-nuclear-rouhani/rouhani-says-iran-will-remain-in-nuclear-deal-idUSKBN1I92T7

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Vlad, Bad and Dangerous to Know

For President Vladimir Putin/
His orders are not for disputin’/
And those who protest/
Face speedy arrest/
By riot cops putting the boot in.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-44024184

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Flower Show

It’s World Naked Gardening Day/

So cast inhibition away/

And get out your hoses/

To water the roses/

Or ready your bush for display.///

(A hardy perennial – I sowed the seeds of something similar last year, but I’ve been titivating it a bit for this year’s show).

 

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Public Enemy Number Two

A Jersey inspector of schools/
Arrested for flouting the rules/
Was baring his backside/
Each day by the trackside/
And slyly depositing stools.///

 

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What’s Up Doc?

There was an old medical doc/
Who swore Donald Trump was a rock,/
And couldn’t be better,/
But now says his letter/
Was written by Trump – what a shock!///

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