Author Archives: twitmericks

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About twitmericks

There is an old fellow called Mick/Who's been penning the odd limerick/I admit he's no Keats/But he does them in tweets/So to follow, you just have to click. https://twitter.com/#!/twitmericks "The limerick master of the twitterati" (The Guardian).

Dennis and the Menace

Posted on January 9, 2014 by twitmericks

There is a Korean named Kim/ Who executes rivals at whim/ And so seems an odd man/ For old Dennis Rodman/ To think needs a tribute from him. ///http://www.theguardian.com/sport/video/2014/jan/08/dennis-rodman-sings-happy-birthday-kim-jong-un-north-korea-video  https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/421225932720832512

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Honourable Member?

Posted on January 8, 2014 by twitmericks

When Boris said Dave treated Nick/ As a shield so the dirt didn’t stick,/ The word prophylactic/ Describing the tactic/ Implies the PM is a dick. ///http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/london-mayor-election/mayor-of-london/10555489/Nick-Clegg-is-David-Camerons-condom-Boris-Johnson-says.html https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/420940543259324416

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Gatesgate

Posted on January 8, 2014 by twitmericks

There is an old fellow named Gates/ Who used to be big in the States/ He caused a big drama/ By slamming Obama/ Who’s no longer one of his mates. ///http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-25645855 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/420936788044443648

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Cold Snap

Posted on January 7, 2014 by twitmericks

There was a US polar vortex/So cold it could penetrate Gore-tex/To utterly freeze/Your elbows and knees/And ice up your cerebral cortex./// http://abcnews.go.com/US/frigid-polar-vortex-cripples-us-straight-day/story?id=21444355 There was a US polar vortexSo cold it could penetrate Gore-texTo utterly freezeYour elbows and kneesAnd ice up … Continue reading →

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Virgin’ on the Ridiculous

Posted on January 6, 2014 by twitmericks

A man who was naked and keen/ Got stuck in a washing-machine/ Some best extra virgin/ Soon saw him emergin’/ Well-oiled but impeccably clean. ///http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/jan/06/rescuers-use-olive-oil-to-extract-naked-man-from-washing-machine https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/420210634429448192

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Tory Glory Story

Posted on January 5, 2014 by twitmericks

There once was a prominent Tory/ Who said tho it got a bit gory/ The Great War was good/ Just misunderstood/ Rejoice in its blood death & glory. ///http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2014/jan/04/labour-gove-first-world-war-comments https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/419825383865724928  

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Morally Bankrupt

Posted on January 3, 2014 by twitmericks

Nick Griffin, who leads the far-right/ Is in a precarious plight/ The financial basis/ Of Britain’s top racist/ Is what we call deep in the shite. ///http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2014/jan/03/nick-griffin-declared-bankrupt-bnp-leader?CMP=twt_fd https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/419222808192102400

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Joint Enterprise

Posted on January 2, 2014 by twitmericks

There is an old state, Colorado/ Where any aficionado/ Can legally buy/ The means to get high – A cannabis buff’s El Dorado./// http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/legal-weed-sales-bring-long-lines-colorado-21395238 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/418530734643896320

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2013 The Year That’s Been

Posted on December 31, 2013 by twitmericks

The Vatican got a new Pope/ And Uruguay legalised dope/ Lasagne con Pony/ Bye bye Berlusconi/ See everyone next year I hope/// https://twitmericks.com/2013/12/19/twitmericks-review-of-the-year-2013/ … The Vatican got a new Pope& Uruguay legalised dopeLasagne con PonyBye bye BerlusconiSee everyone next year I … Continue reading →

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It’s All Gone Pete Gong

Posted on December 31, 2013 by twitmericks

The New Year award of a gong/ Distinguishes folks who belong./ Establishment names/ Made barons and dames/ But this time it’s all gone Pete Tong. ///http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/news/pete-tong-proud-to-be-honoured-with-mbe-9031407.html The New Year award of a gongDistinguishes folks who belong.Establishment namesMade barons and damesBut … Continue reading →

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