On the rocks

Posted on November 21, 2018 by twitmericks

Some curlers got kicked off the rink/

For taking an excess of drink/

For whisky on ice/

Is not very nice,/

Or so many connoisseurs think.///

 

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Kaputsch

Posted on November 20, 2018 by twitmericks

Though May has received the odd letter/

From Tory MPs out to getter,/

Their coup fizzled out,/

Increasing the doubt/

The plotters could run this show better.///

https://www.yahoo.com/news/jacob-rees-mogg-admits-brexiteer-125431446.html

 

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Die-ing for a poo*

Posted on November 19, 2018 by twitmericks

The wombat marsupial species,/

Contrives to make cubical faeces:/

The poo is compressed in/

The creature’s intestine,/

Then packed into stackable pieces.///

*Thanks to Richard Heald for improved headline.

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Turning a deaf ear

Posted on November 19, 2018 by twitmericks

The POTUS, he says, hasn’t heard a/

Recording depicting a murder/

And leaps to defend/

His bloodthirsty friend/

In terms that get ever absurder.///

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Farts match

Posted on November 17, 2018 by twitmericks

A Dutch player losing at darts/

Declared he’d been put off by farts;/

The Scot said “Who smelt it,/

We tend to find, dealt it -/

Try sniffing your own nether parts!”///

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Weight to go

Posted on November 17, 2018 by twitmericks

A weight which was called Le Grand K/

Was woefully wasting away;/

The world was as one/

On what would be done,/

And worked out a new way to weigh.///

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Leavers gonna leave

Posted on November 15, 2018 by twitmericks

A two-parter for you today…

1)

Dear PM, So long, it’s been real,/

But now on reflection I feel/

I cannot in conscience/

Support this old nonsense -/

Although I helped broker the deal.///

2)

Dear kindly Prime Minister May,/

I’m sadly unable to stay/

And serve in a cabinet/

Without Mr Raabinet,/

Sincere regards, Esther McVey.///

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-46219495

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Cabinet pudding

Posted on November 14, 2018 by twitmericks

The Cabinet meeting on Brexit/

Agreed, though the details still vex it,/

The deal done by May,/

But most pundits say/

Just wait till the Commons rejects it.///

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-46215930

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Writer-Man

Posted on November 13, 2018 by twitmericks

A hero creator named Stan/
Helped give us the whole Marvel clan/
From Spidey and Thor/ 
To Fantastic Four -/
Let’s hear it for Comic Book Man.///

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Fair weather friend

Posted on November 11, 2018 by twitmericks

Remembering those who were slain/

And promising never again/

Brings leaders together/

Whatever the weather -/

But not Donald Trump if it’s rain.///

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-46168995

 

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