Monthly Archives: December 2017

Please No Moore

Electors considered Roy Moore/ And voted to show him the door;/ For President Trump,/ His pal on the stump,/ This signifies trouble in store./// http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-42333712 Electors considered Roy MooreAnd voted to show him the door;For President Trump,His pal on the … Continue reading

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Fly him to the Moon

There was an old orange-faced loon/ Who wanted to go to the moon./ “Enjoy your big ride”,/ The people replied – / “It can’t come a moment too soon!”/// https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-trump-space/trump-wants-to-send-u-s-astronauts-back-to-moon-someday-mars-idUSKBN1E51QP There was an old orange-faced loonWho wanted to go to … Continue reading

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Getting Lairy with Dairy

Two versions for this limerick: My first effort went: Mourinho was letting off steam/ At members of Man City’s team/ When one of that ilk/ Threw semi-skimmed milk/ At one used to coaching the cream./// Then I remembered a rather … Continue reading

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Earth Mover

A recent explosion from Kim/ Has altered the world’s outer rim/ The man from Pyongyang/ Said this was a bang/ That sure made the earth move for him./// A recent explosion from KimHas altered the world's outer rimThe man from … Continue reading

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Gin Sling

While holding a drink, young Ben Duckett/ Unwisely decided to chuckett/ He said though I should/ Take care and be good/ I’ve had a few pints now, so Fuckett./// https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2017/dec/09/england-ben-duckett-dropped-ashes-tour-game-after-perth-bar-incident While holding a drink, young Ben DuckettUnwisely decided to chuckettHe … Continue reading

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Blockhead

A foolhardy YouTubing pranker/ Attracted the Fire Brigade’s rancour/ For anyone shovin’/ His head in an oven/ Filled up with cement is a witless imbecile./// https://news.sky.com/story/youtube-prankster-cements-head-in-microwave-in-wolverhampton-11160640 https://twitter.com/twitmericks/status/939142453986197504

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Bringing Home the Bacon?

This little pig went to Brussels/ To break with the Treaty of Rome/ But after some flexing of muscles/ Went Oui Oui Oui all the way home./// *The observant among you will have instantly noticed that this is not a … Continue reading

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To be Franken…

Announcing his own resignation/ Because of alleged molestation/ Al Franken suggests/ When talking sex pests/ We look at the head of the nation./// https://www.thedailybeast.com/al-franken-ironic-im-leaving-when-trump-roy-moore-have-support Announcing his own resignationBecause of alleged molestationAl Franken suggestsWhen talking sex pestsWe look at the head … Continue reading

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Notes on a Scandal

There was a young model, Christine,/ Who when she was only 19/ By having affairs/ And sitting on chairs/ Shook up the political scene./// https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2017/dec/05/christine-keeler-former-model-at-heart-of-profumo-affair-dies There was a young model, Christine,Who when she was only 19By having affairsAnd sitting on … Continue reading

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Brex for the Border

As Britain negotiates Brexit/ The border continues to vexit/ With May’s coalition/ In fragile condition/ This could be the issue that fexit./// https://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/republic-of-ireland/dup-vows-to-block-any-brexit-border-deal-which-separates-ni-from-rest-of-uk-36376499.html As Britain negotiates BrexitThe border continues to vexitWith May's coalitionIn fragile conditionThis could be the issue that … Continue reading

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