Category Archives: Uncategorized

Tesla profits up in smoke

Posted on September 8, 2018 by twitmericks

When Musk saw a joint being lit/ He took a few puffs of that shit,/ But Elon the joker/ Was not the sole toker -/ His company too took a hit./// When Musk saw a joint being litHe took a … Continue reading →

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Bradley Informed

Posted on September 8, 2018 by twitmericks

A minister named Karen Bradley,/ Whose brief’s Northern Ireland,/ sadly Has had to admit/ To knowing jack shit/ About it, which went down quite badly./// A minister named Karen Bradley,Whose brief's Northern Ireland, sadlyHas had to admitTo knowing jack shitAbout … Continue reading →

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Private Dick

Posted on September 6, 2018 by twitmericks

A spy from Korea, Black Venus,/ Enacted a plan most ingenious/ To tape Kim Jong-Il,/ Concealing with skill/ A dictaphone inside his penis./// I don’t suppose the recording device was that actual brand, but I couldn’t resist the word under … Continue reading →

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Pole-axed

Posted on September 5, 2018 by twitmericks

A nursery head lost her role/ When parents did not find it droll/ For children to start in/ Their new kindergarten/ While dancers gyrate on a pole./// A nursery head lost her roleWhen parents did not find it drollFor children … Continue reading →

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West wingnut

Posted on September 5, 2018 by twitmericks

The veteran journalist Bob/ From talking to Donald Trump’s mob,/ Found less stable genius,/ More misdemeanious/ Unstable dumbass nutjob./// Some readers may be thrown by the scansion in line 5, which appears to be a syllable short when taken on … Continue reading →

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Nike takes the knee

Posted on September 4, 2018 by twitmericks

The Kaepernick advert for Nike/ Has got right-wing critics all spiky;/ They’re torching their shoes/ And lighting a fuse/ Right under Trump’s volatile psyche./// https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/american-football/45407340 The Kaepernick advert for NikeHas got right-wing critics all spiky;They're torching their shoes And lighting … Continue reading →

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Pastor: “I felt a right tit!”

Posted on September 2, 2018 by twitmericks

The pastor Charles Ellis the Third/ Regrets to admit that he erred,/ In hugging Ms Grande/ He got rather hande/ And border infractions occurred./// The pastor Charles Ellis the ThirdRegrets to admit that he erred,In hugging Ms GrandeHe got rather … Continue reading →

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Naan-membership

Posted on September 1, 2018 by twitmericks

Post-Brexit, announces Liz Truss,/ More naan exports could be a plus,/ The same goes for crumpets,/ Though these things she trumpets/ Were not on the Leave campaign bus.///   Post-Brexit, announces Liz Truss,More naan exports could be a plus,The same … Continue reading →

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The Brexit Bop

Posted on August 31, 2018 by twitmericks

The UK might just have a chance/ Of backing from countries like France/ To have and eat cake/ If they undertake/ To not let Theresa May dance./// https://www.standard.co.uk/news/politics/the-maybot-strikes-twice-theresa-may-busts-out-her-awkward-dance-moves-again-on-kenya-trip-a3924196.html The UK might just have a chanceOf backing from countries like FranceTo … Continue reading →

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Portaloo Sunset

Posted on August 29, 2018 by twitmericks

The government’s got a great ruse/ For post-Brexit motorway queues;/ In case of no deal,/ When shit becomes real,/ They’ll put up some portable loos./// The government's got a great ruseFor post-Brexit motorway queues;In case of no deal,When shit becomes … Continue reading →

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