Jesus Christ!

Posted on November 16, 2017 by twitmericks

There was an old Renaissance daub,/

A painting of Christ with an orb,/

Da Vinci’s, they say,/

Whose buyer will pay/

A sum that is hard to absorb.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-42000696

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Susej Role

Posted on November 15, 2017 by twitmericks

A baker got some people riled,/

Exhibiting what they reviled/

As insensitivity,/

For in Greggs’ nativity/

A sausage roll played the Christ Child.///

https://www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/greggs-forced-to-apologise-after-replacing-baby-jesus-with-sausage-roll-in-advent-calendar-a3691566.html

 

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Oz Mandate (or Womandate)

Posted on November 15, 2017 by twitmericks

Australia’s now had its say/

From Darwin to Botany Bay/

From Perth to Gold Coast/

A ballot by post/

Backed marriage for pairs who are gay.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-australia-41992344

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Azzurri get the Blues

Posted on November 14, 2017 by twitmericks

Supporters of football in Italy/
Are gnashing their teeth, weeping bitaly;/
The national side/
Has not qualified,/
With Sweden repelling them gritaly.///

https://www.thelocal.it/20171114/the-saddest-reactions-to-italy-world-cup-flop

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Brexit Strategy

Posted on November 13, 2017 by twitmericks

 

The bill meant to implement Brexit/
Won’t pass until parliament chexit/
And gives it some scrutiny/
So if Tories mutiny/
It may be the Commons rejexit.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-41975277

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No Offence but…

Posted on November 12, 2017 by twitmericks

A chap from Korea named Kim/

Called Donald decrepit and dim/

Said Trump in retort:/

“He’s fat and he’s short/

But I’m never rude about him!”///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-41958553

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Malodorous Malefactor

Posted on November 11, 2017 by twitmericks

A flatulent suspect departed/

Soon after his questioning started,/

For rather than speak/

He’d just lift a cheek -/

To answer each question, he farted.///

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-41950775

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Holy Mother of God!

Posted on November 10, 2017 by twitmericks

An auditor from Alabama/

Said “quit with the anti-Moore clamour;/

Take old Joseph’s scene/

With Mary the teen -/

They didn’t put him in the slammer!”///

Jesus, Mary and Joseph: Alabama state auditor defends Roy Moore on teen sex encounter allegations

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Hariri Mystery

Posted on November 10, 2017 by twitmericks

Has Lebanese PM Hariri/

Lost interest in power, grown wiri?/

Or is he a victim/

Of Saudis who trictim?/

Perhaps a more plausible thiri.///

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/middle-east/saad-al-hariri-saudi-arabia-lebanese-pm-held-hostage-future-movement-accusation-iran-crisis-a8047411.html

 

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Trouser Snake

Posted on November 9, 2017 by twitmericks

Police found two drunken carousers/

Were covert reptilian-housers,/

A visible writhin’/

Betraying a python/

Secreted down one fellow’s trousers.///

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/nov/08/germany-detained-man-darmstadt-baby-python-pants

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